Silver

Chapter 64 - then

My grades at school were dropping. I was distracted all the time. Love was an illness, it made pulp of a perfectly sane mind. I couldn't follow what the teacher said, all I saw were colours; shades of greys and browns, because she was boring, and all I could hear were soundbites of what Jarvis said, 'Let's run away together', 'We'll work hard,' 'we're symbiotic'. I couldn't follow any of my thoughts because those colours were so damn annoying.

I was called to see the Principal. His name was Mr Davidson, sky blue with a frayed yellow edge.

'Take a seat Sylvie,' he said. I'd never been in his office before. He had a heavy oak desk and a reproduction Streeton on the wall. 'Is there anything you'd like to talk about?'

'Ah. No.'

'You have always been an exemplary student. Your sister was one of our finest too. She's working in the medical field, isn't she?'

'Pharmaceuticals.'

'Right. Well, as you know, we are an exclusive school and we expect certain grades from our students. You have always had excellent grades. But when a student starts to slip, we start wondering what is going on in their life. Now I know it's a difficult time for girls, they often get married around now, they need to set up their home and it can be distracting. But you have to get focused again, Sylvie. What do you want to do with your life?'

'I want to be an architect.'

'Well, you need very good maths,' he started clicking on some figures on his computer, 'You're hardly scraping through right now. Technology and Design, you're doing okay in. Physics is appalling, Sylvie, so are your History and Classical Studies marks. The only subject you seem to be doing all right in is Art. But then, who doesn't do well in art?'

My stomach flattened.

'This is extremely disappointing. What are we going to do about you?'

I hated the way he talked down at me, his condescending voice was nauseating.

'Anything you'd like to say? I always give my students the opportunity to speak up.'

I only croaked, 'not really.'

'Well, here's what we're going to do. You're going to go into the ten-point system. Tuesday night remediation with Mrs Pearse, she's very good. If we don't see a marked improvement after four weeks we will have to make a further assessment. We can't have disengaged students pulling down the results of the whole school. We would lose our reputation.'

It took all my effort not to cry in front of him. I rose from the chair and murmured 'thank you', of all things. Just as I was about to exit the door, he said, 'And stop thinking about the colours of curtains and matching scatter cushions. We are here to give our girls the best opportunities in life.'

I ran down the stairs, through the big double doors and I kept on running down to the oval. All the girls were in class, so I was all alone. No one could see the tears streaming down my cheeks. I held on to the rails around the oval, looked out at the bay, and I cried because I hated my privileged life so much. I hated this school with its 'reputation' to uphold, I hated my destiny of living to work. I didn't want any of it. All I wanted was Jarvis.