The Colours We Give | On hold

| 2 |

" A life with love 

is a life that's been lived "

- Supermarket Flowers, Ed Sheeran

☀

arashi

PORTMOUTH HIGH is enormous in every sense of the word. And beautiful too. The building is designed like a court in a vintage-elite style. Since Portmouth is considered one of the best private schools in the state, the construction lives up to your expectations if not exceed. The walls are high and white, and the vast gates have this way of making you feel smaller than what you already are. Like you're being encompassed in an ant hole overflowing with ants. Except the ants here are not as uniform and orderly.

After I finish concentrating this school's massive entirety, I start to move towards the entrance. My heartbeat grows fast. I don't know why I'm feeling so scared, though. Not one person has thrown me an awkward glance until now, neither has a bully has charged at me. In fact, one guy even smiled at me, to which I gave a half smile back. If everything is so normal, why am I still scared?

I'm not scared of not fitting in. I'm not scared of standing out. I've never been one to care. Then what exactly am I scared of?

Dad had asked me this morning if I wanted him to come with me. I said no, of course. He hadn't gone to work because of me for a whole week so that I could adjust to this new city comfortably. My guilt levels are at an all time high and if he hadn't gone today, they would've exploded. 

I've already reached the top of the staircase, and the doors of the school look bigger than ever. I'm still contemplating to go inside, God knows for what reason. As I can't make up my mind, I just let my feet drag me into the school. 

And suddenly, I'm inside.

A sprightly voice greets me before I can admire the infrastructure. It belongs to a very, very blonde boy who has very, very light-coloured eyes. Almost golden. Looking at him feels like looking at a dim flashlight.

"Hey," he says, like we've known each for years. 

I try to remember if I ever saw him before, but there's nothing familiar about him. "Hi?"

"What were you doing outside?" he asks.

I tilt my head. "Nothing. Why?"

He lets out a laugh. "It's just that I saw you standing at the exact same place for five minutes straight."

"Oh, right," I say, laughing along. I must've looked like a weirdo. "I was just thinking if I should enter."

His lips form into a small 'o'. "Wanted to bunk? I'll join you," he says, smiling. "Wanna get coffee from Ramsey's?"

I shake my head. "No, but can you take me to the principal's office?"

His expression now fills with bewilderment. Why would you want to go the Principal's office? his face clearly asks. What kind of shit did you do?

"I'm a new student. Mrs. Burton asked me to meet her before my classes start." I explain, still quite shaky.

His body eases. "Oh, okay," his cheeks flushed suddenly. "I'll take you there then," he says with a smile.