PETALS | PHAN

-ˏˋ one ˎˊ-

☾ ☽

"didn't you wanna take me to dinner?" dan grinned, tilting his head to look at phil. phil grunted, burying his nose in the back of his neck.

"yeah. but now i wanna stay here."

dan giggled, grabbing a handful of phil's hair. "that's not very romantic of you."

"yeah, it is," phil replied, his voice muffled. "i just wanna be alone with you."

dan shivered. even after so long, it got to him when he said things like that.

he rolled over so he could face him and wrap his arms around phil's neck. he slept in his bed every night now, and it made him almost excited for the day to end. he just liked being near him- feeling his warmth next to him all night, the faint smell of his body wash wafting over him... everything about him was warmth and comfort, and dan was an addict.

dan sighed and pressed his face into phil's neck. it made his heart race every time he touched him. "do you think i'm doing enough?"

he could picture phil frowning clearly on the backs of his eyelids, his mouth gently turning down and his eyebrows furrowing. "what do you mean?"

dan hesitated, pursing his lips. "i mean... with... my abilities."

he hated bringing these things up; he could tell he scared phil sometimes, and he couldn't blame him what with everything that had happened to them. they hadn't been bothered since they'd just barely gotten away, because jarvis wasn't the type to chase. he wasn't the type to do anything publicly. but dan could tell phil was nervous... scared that he was coming back.

dan tried not to think about it. he didn't talk about it, either. he didn't see the point in panicking when everything was going so well.

phil touched his chin to make dan look him in the eyes. "how could you not be doing enough?"

dan thought about this a lot, though. and he hadn't told him yet.

"i'm supposed to be coming into my powers, right? i feel like i'm not... living up to whatever potential i'm supposed to." dan bit his lip, searching phil's face eagerly. "i mean, they've gotten stronger, i suppose. and i can control them better. but i really thought..." he paused. "i don't know. this can't be all i am."

phil scoffed, sitting up. "all you are?"

dan laughed softly, hugging his knees to his chest and smiling timidly at him. "alright, i guess that's kind of a ridiculous thing to say. but you know what i mean."

"dan, everything you are is you. last year you didn't even wanna be you." he sighed, pushing his fingers into dan's hair. dan nearly purred, leaning into his touch. jesus, he was an addict. phil pushed his glasses back up his nose. "i think you're looking for reasons to dislike yourself. i promise you're doing enough."

dan nodded and leaned against him, even though he didn't really think he was being fully understood. he wasn't talking about not being enough, or little things like controlling it... he'd been seriously wondering why everyone had been so scared of him. they knew something he didn't, he was sure of it.

flowers weren't scary. so there had to be more.

luna pushed through the crack between the bedroom door and the wall, slinking into the room. she jumped up on the mattress, and dan smiled at her, reaching out to scratch behind her ear.

phil took off his glasses for a second to rub his eyes before putting them back on. "do you actually wanna go to dinner?"

dan paused before shaking his head, putting his focus on the cat that was now rubbing her head against his thigh and purring loudly.

"...what do you wanna do?"

dan knew what he was asking... he could always feel the energy in the room shift to match phil's mood, like he was some kind of powerful beacon. dan smiled, shrugging, still refusing to look at him.

"are we not doing something?"

"sure..." phil scooted closer to dan and luna. dan could feel himself getting goosebumps anywhere on his skin that phil was close to. "but we could be doing something else."

dan rolled his eyes, finally glancing at him. luna meowed in distaste.

"please, phil, there's a baby in the room."

phil rolled his eyes back. "oh, she's old enough." he scooped the cat into his arms and carefully dropped her on the ground. dan giggled and watched him as he reached out, wrapping his arms around dan's waist.

"you're cute," he mumbled, touching phil's nose with his thumb. phil responded by pulling him into his lap and kissing him on the mouth.

dan wrapped his arms around phil's neck, giving in. he grabbed his shirt, and he could feel little roses sprout between his fingers. he grinned against phil's lips.

but still, in the back of his head, he knew... he was more.

and he wasn't sure if he was ready for that.