dear Junmyeon (jung eunji/kim junmyeon)

ii • realisation

"This is the fifth time, and yet you always give me the same excuse." Her friend ranted. Eunji sipped on her coffee casually, listening to her banter. It was not going to end any sooner.

"You're not even working, Eunji. Namjoo is, and yet she could make time for us."

Eunji lowered her gaze. "I'm sorry, Bomi. I just can't."

As expected, her friend cried out and tugged on her hair, ruining the perfect curls.

"But why? Junmyeon wouldn't leave you if you go to a three days trip with us!"

Eunji choked on her heart. The pain that she struggled to hide resurfaced, pulling on her every restraint. She blinked desperately to get rid of the tears.

Bomi's eyes widened and in an instant her arms were around her friend, hugging her tightly.
"Oh, honey I'm sorry. I didn't mean to- I'm sorry..."

Eunji whisked a stray tear away and nodded, forcing a smile.

"It's okay, we're fine. I'm fine." I'm fine, she thought, I will be.

"No you're not! What did he do this time? Is he still coming  home later at night?" Bomi questioned, and Eunji turned rigid. She scoffed and laughed darkly.

"Oh the thing that I would do to Kim-freaking-Junmyeon... " Bomi trailed off, her eyes glinting with mischief.

Eunji untangled her friend off of her, pushing Bomi back into her seat. They were separated with a coffee table, but for some reason Bomi was able to give her a bear hug with the barrier between them. Eunji was surprised that her friend did not knock their coffee off. She would be pissed.

"Stop." Eunji said sternly, "We are fine. He is just busy. It's a business season in his company after all. I understand where he is coming from."

Bomi crossed her arms stubbornly and scoffed. "Then why won't you come with us? It's only three days Eunji, and he's busy, you said so yourself. Aren't you bored at home?"

Eunji sighed. "I know but, I-I can't, Bomi. I can't leave him, not even for three days."

"Eunji..."

"I'm really sorry, Bomi. I just- I just can't. Please, you'll understand, right?" Eunji said, desperation heavy in her voice. Bomi stared at her friend for a while, taking in her watery eyes and scrunched brows. She never saw Eunji that way. Eunji was one of the strongest woman she knew. She would not shed a tear when other people are too, because she felt like she needed to be strong for them. Which is why Eunji was their group's vitamin.

But right then, Bomi was not sure anymore. She have not met Eunji for months. They caught up with everything with face times and group chats. Sometimes she will call her and talk on the phone for hours, and vice versa.

But maybe, Bomi thought, maybe there's something she didn't want to tell us.

Shaking her head, she sighed. "No, I don't understand you, Eunji." She said, and watched as Eunji's face fell. "I don't understand why you never go to any meet ups with us, we're still your friends. It's like you've changed after you married him. And I don't like that."

Eunji bit her lips and kept her head bowed. The waterworks have started, and she did not even stop it. Not like she wanted to. She deserved it, she have literally bailed on her friends a lot of times, and if they did not want to be her friend anymore she will understand.

But she just could not leave him. Not when her secret and life were at risk.

"But, Eunji, I don't like watching you cry. I don't know what is happening, and it's killing me. I'm your best friend, why don't you explain it to me?"