falling apart. | kylian mbappe

17.

one week later

"Can you please take a picture of us?" A young girl smiles at me as she handles her phone. She poses next to Kylian and I gladly take the photo for her. "Thank you!" She greets me while looking at the picture I just did for her.

We walk inside the stadium being stopped by a few more fans who nicely asked me to take pictures for them and also, asked Kylian, to sign jerseys or posters.

"You look beautiful today." Kylian kisses me and I smile feeling huge guilt inside me. "Well, every day." He shrugs.

"I would say the same but you look like a turtle so..." I joke and he pretends to be mad but ends up laughing as well.

"Wasted times, I spent with someone else. She wasn't even half of you." Kylian says to me while I'm just paying attention to the game.

We are inside the VIP Boxes but he is not playing because he got a red card on the last game.

"We need to talk." I spat seriously turning around to face him.

"About what?" He smiles, only if he knew.

"Why do you love me?" I ask for the millionth time. "Why are you here with me?" 

Just like every other time, he murmurs, "There's too many. It's just too obvious." He shrugs.

"If it's so obvious why can't I see?" I reply.

"Maybe you're just too stubborn to accept it." And immediately my mouth drops open in false shock and he'll follow up at the speed of light with. "And I love you, obviously."

I sigh looking away from his gaze. I don't feel that way.

"Do you believe in love at first sight?" He questions me this time and I deny with the movement of my head as a response.

"I have never believed in love at first sight, that we are able to give our hearts away upon one view or that after just one glance we are in love. But I do believe the second I saw your eyes, I loved them. And the moment I saw your smile, I loved it. And the instant I heard you laugh I fell in love with the sound. I have never believed in love at first sight but I do believe that after one glance in your direction I have belonged to you completely." He smiles at me and it broke my heart.

"I'm sorry," I whine getting up under his confused look.

"What is going on America?" He asks worriedly getting up too.

"I can't be with you Kylian," I state and as his gaze turns mad.

"Why America? Now, why?" He answers tired of my words.

"Because you are young and you deserve to enjoy your life as a teenager, you don't need to be stuck in a relationship with a girl who needs more than that. Football is always first in your life, and our lives are different, we are different from the time we met." I explain to him, not wanting my voice to break.

"Are you saying that you are not important to me?." He replies annoyed.

"I mean very little to you and I was okay until I realized that I have to forget how I feel and remember what I deserve," I say and he denies with his head.

"This is bullshit." He spats.

"Sometimes I wouldn't mind if I was less important, but I've got you to let me down." I murmur.

"That is not true." He replies. "You push people away and build walls to protect your heart but the problem with that is that sometimes, you get stuck behind them and there is no one left to save you."

"I don't need anyone to save me, I'll save me myself." I grab my things and leave the section, but Kylian is following me closely.

"So that's it?" He stands in front of me blocking my way. "You are gonna leave me." He ironically says and I nod. "Here." He adds.

"I break your heart this week and you'll probably feel better by the weekend." I shrug.

"You can find someone else but you're still mine." He responds.

"The problem with that is that I was never yours," I say. "I don't love you anymore Kylian." I harshly lie.

"I don't believe you." He laughs sarcastically.

"I don't know what the hell my heart beats for, but it isn't you, not anymore." I walk past him.

"You do love me, stop trying to be mean."

"No, I don't." I insist.

"You are trying to convince yourself you don't but you do." He lays out.

"Our love has gone cold." I sigh.  "I tried my best but it hurts my chest."

"I don't care, I want you to stay even though you don't want me." He grabs my arm, stopping me once again. "Don't break my heart and soul all at once." He begs.

"Last time I checked you were the one that left me in a wreck," I utter glaring at him. "My momma told me once that whatever I do, I never have to run back to what broke me," I add.

"Is this about me again?" He asks. "Don't you realize you are always making up excuses or lying to not be with me? Be straight forward America, if you don't want me anymore then I'll get out of your life that is a deal, but I don't want to see you coming back to my house, pretending that you love just to be with me for a night." He raises his voice.

"I'm trying to do that, but you are the one being all dramatic here," I reply to him.

"Maybe if we could talk about it or tell me things in a civilize way and not always running away from me like if I did something wrong again because I did not." He spats and I nod.

"I have so much to say but have so little courage to say it," I admit looking at the ground. " But it is better to be alone," I finish.

"My love for you this past week was not enough, right?" He rhetorically questions me and I nod in response.

"I gave you everything. How was that not enough?" He replies confused.

"We have a different definition of everything, I guess." I sigh. "I'm going to leave to Madrid, so don't try to look for me because I won't be here." I finish walking away, this time he doesn't stop me.

"America!" He yells and I turn around one last time. "I know I'm nothing special, but I hope you'll never replace me."