Gym Socks

Chapter 19

"Go ahead. Do it." Negan says making my heart sink. The men look at each other, then at the saviors, then at us. This continues for what feels like a decade suddenly I hear Frankie gasp out as a man sinks a blade deep inside her.

"You son of a bitch!" Negan yells as a large gun fight breaks loose. I freak out and struggle to get myself untied and free. I make my way over to Frankie who is bleeding profusely. I try to apply as much pressure to her wound as I can but she is bleeding out too fast.

"No. No no no. This is my fault. I should've gone alone."

"Hey. It's okay." Frankie says grabbing my hand. "It's all okay."

I try and try to hold her wound but Negan pulls me from behind.

"We got to go. Right the fuck now." Negan demands trying to avoid getting shot.

"I'm not leaving her! I won't!" I cry out holding Frankie.

"Brooke she's already gone. She's dead, she's dead as the fucking walkers."

All the gunshot noise has attracted walkers, and a shit ton of them. I tell Frankie goodbye as Negan drags me away from the scene. We run through the woods killing a few walkers on the way as we get back to his truck. He forces me inside as I sit in silence.

"That was stupid as fuck. Running away from the fucking Sanctuary? You know I almost went and KILLED one of Rick's people right? Like you do fucking realize that shit."

"I don't give a fuck! I do not fucking care! About them, about you! They didn't care for me obviously anymore. And I'm just here as an advantage point. So who gives a fucking shit anymore!" I explode on him. He doesn't say anything after that. We arrive to the gates and I exit the vehicle before he can even stop driving it. I walk up to the wives room and I realize I look like a nightmare. Covered in dirt, tears, and blood. The other girls just stare at me. I slam the bathroom door shut and hop in the shower. I sit on the floor and cry. I cry for what feels like hours. Eventually I get up, get dressed, and go to bed. When I wake up I am unsure of what time it is. Nor do I give two shits. I go into the main room and grab a full bottle of wine. I drink it until I can't drink it anymore. And then I eventually black out in the middle of the main room for anyone to see. I've lost all control, all meaning. I got my best friend killed and for what? For my own selfish ways.

Eventually I wake up again and I'm sitting in the infirmary. I was hoping everything was just a bad dream but it wasn't, I have a pounding headache and feel sick to my stomach as I vomit all the contents, or what's left of it, in to a trash bin.

"Good. You're awake. You know drinking like that is dangerous. I understand you're upset but you're really gonna destroy yourself by doing that." The doctor says.

"That's the fucking point." I groan laying back down. I hear him radioing for Negan and cringe. I don't want to see him. Not now, not ever. I'm still going to get out of here one way or another. This time the only person I'll put at risk is myself. He knows I won't go to Alexandria. He knows I'm not stupid enough for that. No, I'm going to get as far as possible from both these communities.