Chapter 6

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The ride back is quiet, too quiet. I want to say something, apologize, but I'm scared of the reaction I might get. He grips the wheel tightly, his knuckles white. I'm not gonna lie, I'm pretty scared. I don't think he'd hurt me physically, but emotionally? I can't say.
"Negan." I say quieter than a mouse. It sounded a lot louder in my head.
He either didn't hear me or he ignores me.
"I'm sorry." I say sadly and truthfully.
"You're going to be." He snarls darkly.
"It- it's just. The girls said I didn't have to do anything that makes me feel uncomfortable. And that made me feel extremely uncomfortable." I say.
"A man can't kiss his own fucking wife?" Negan argues
"It's just, it's all so new Negan. I'm sorry. I'll try to do better but it's just I feel like I barely know you anymore. Please forgive me." I plead not wanting to feel Negan's wrath.
"Well darlin' why didn't you just say something? You know I'm a reasonable kinda guy."
'Yeah when YOU want to be.' I think to myself but wouldn't dare say out loud.
He takes one hand off the wheel and places it on my thigh and I feel myself tense up. I turn to look out the window and get lost in my thoughts.
Before all this Negan used to always hold me after class, after school, after practice. Hell, he'd even pull me out of class every now and then. I was his go-to person. Anytime he needed volleyball nets set up, or ping pong tables assembled he alway asked me to do it. Hell, he even called me out of English to help him find his wallet. But I know it was just because he was a lonely man and he seemed to genuinely enjoy my presence. There was no harm in that right? It wasn't until we kept getting closer. It went from him asking me to do favors for him after practice (non sexual of course) to him driving me home. My mom worked double-shifts back to back so I didn't get to see her until late at night and really early in the morning. So I usually had to walk from practice. It was about a 45 minute to an hour walk to and from my school. One day it was pouring down rain and I had forgotten an umbrella. I didn't really mind though.
——
The rain poured heavily on my pale skin. I lifted my book-bag higher onto my shoulders and slipped in my earbuds. I begin walking when I hear honking to my right. I look into the street and see a black car pull up next to me. I instantly recognize the vehicle. They roll down the window.
"Need a ride?" Coach Negan asks.
"No I'm okay, I walk everyday to and from school. A little rain doesn't bother me." I say. It's not that I don't want to get in the car I just feel bad about making him go out of his way.
"Come on Rookie the temperatures dropping and it doesn't seem like the rains gonna let up any fucking time soon." He insists. I was always taught not to get into cars with strangers, but he wasn't a stranger, right? I get in the passenger seat.
"You look like you're freezing your ass off. Take this." He says throwing me his hoodie.
——
"Earth to Brooke." Negan says waving his hand rudely in front of my face.
"Huh, what?" I respond annoyed.
"We are almost at the sanctuary. What were you thinking so deeply about?" My cheeks go red because I was thinking of him.
"Oh nothing- just... before all this." I say not specifying what exactly. Although I know he will ask.
"What like... with your mom. School... me?" He asks as if on cue.
"Of course you'd think I'm thinking about you." I say rolling my eyes even though he's right.
"But you're not denying it." He notes as I roll my eyes again.
"Seriously what were you thinking though, I'm curious."
"Why is it so important and why do you care!" I argue.
"Because I know it was about me." He teases smirking.
"What are you, a mind reader. How could you have possibly known that I was thinking about you?" I ask.
"Because you just admitted it, now fess up." He smirks.
"It's not a big deal. I was just thinking about the first time you drove me home. And how much my mom worked." I confess as he smirks.
"What?" I ask
"I knew you still think about me." He smiled proudly. As I yet again roll my eyes. We pull up at the sanctuary and I step out walking to my room. "Come by my room in an hour, seems we have some catching up to do!" Negan yells out to me.
Great.
"We'll see." I say back and go past the guards and through the doors. "Wear something hot!" He jokes as I ignore him. I'm still pissed at him, I haven't forgotten that he's using me. I enter the wives room and get a couple of dirty looks. Negan never took them anywhere and Negan definitely didn't allow them to wear normal clothing like he did for me.
The only one who was super nice to me was Frankie. She didn't care if he spent a lot of time with me, as long as it means she doesn't have to do anything for him.
"How was your trip?" She asks "where'd he take you?"
"To Alexandria." I say as the other wives begin eavesdrop. "He used me for leverage and to intimidate them. That bastard." I say angrily. I begin to open the doors in my room "Who's clothes are these?" I ask noticing there are clothing that don't belong to me.
"Sherry's. She was his old wife. She left though. Or was killed. The story is still unclear. But you can have anything you want of hers." She explains as I shrug. Negan said wear something hot, yeah right.
I grab a pair of my fitting jeans and a dark grey t-shirt and turn to leave.
"Going somewhere?" Frankie asks.
"Negan asked me to meet him in his room to catch up or whatever. Told me to wear something hot." I say laughing.
"And THATS what you're wearing." Amber says butting in.
"Yep."
"He's gonna kill you." Frankie jokes, or at least I think she's joking.
"Well I don't have much "sexy" clothing nor will I objectify myself for his pleasure." I say slipping on my black flats and walking out of the wives ward.

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