Always

Chapter 11

Chapter 11
Emma's pov
I just stayed in my state of laughter, being too embarrassed that I had basically just drooled over Ashton. Like what an idiot. "what is wrong with you?"ashton asks, looking as confused as I was feeling. I continue to laugh, and I'm getting to the point where my stomach is hurting, I cant even look at him right now. I'm far too embarrassed. I finally contain myself and realize that it happened and there is nothing I can do about it now. "sorry. I don't know what happened. I just started thinking about you sitting here. Alone. Watching the titanic." I say teasingly, playing off what had just happened. "oh shut up." He says while smiling. I laugh a little and get relaxed, ready to watch a movie I've seen about a billion times. I can't stop thinking about the moment me and Ashton just had. I know I should, I mean I have an amazing boyfriend. But, he's not Ashton. I cant shake that, nobody is Ashton. I'm only ever going to love him. Alright, alright. So I'm being a bit dramatic, but c'mon I'm having a major dilemma here. I shake my thoughts and decide to just enjoy this moment. I sit crisscrossed and watch the movie, preparing myself for the tears.

Ashton's pov
"i'll never let go. I promise." I hear playing on the tv and realize I hadn't even been paying attention to the movie. "aww" Emma sniffles. I look over to see Emma's tear filled eyes. She looks over at me "How do you not cry?" "because I've seen this movie about a hundred times. It stopped being sad after the first time." "well... you have no heart." She says while wiping her tears away. I just smile at her. "are you feeling better?" She asked looking a bit concerned. "not really. But I'll be alright." I mumbled a little. "i never even asked, whats wrong, are you having a headache or are you sick?" Neither. "just a headache. I'm fine really." I assured her I was fine. She nodded her head and went on to say, "i missed you at school today." "and why is that?" I ask, hiding a smile. "well Blake was on his phone all of lunch and I had nobody to talk to." "you could've called or texted me. You know I would've talked to you." "yeah, but you weren't feeling good. I didn't want to bother you or anything." "Emma." I said, while grabbing one of her hands to make sure I had her full attention. I immediately felt my stomach do a flip when my hand touched hers. She looked at me, waiting for what I was about to say. "please don't ever think you are or will bother me. Ok? You never have, and you never will. I love talking to you and being around you. You can talk to me anytime. I love you so much." What the Frick??? Why did I just say that? I'm literally freaking out on the inside. I start to laugh nervously, trying to think of what to say.... "as a friend of course." OH. MY. LORD. I just made things a hundred times worse. I looked at her to see her look down, almost disappointed. She was probably just trying not to laugh from the embarrassment of what I just said. She had no response, but hugged me very tight and of course I hugged her back. If she did have any feelings for me, I just completely ruined it.

Emma's pov
"as a friend of course." Well. My heart kinda just broke. I don't know why though, I knew he had no feelings for me and that he was with another girl, but there was something about him saying "as a friend" that shattered my heart into a billion pieces. I couldn't look at him because I knew that if I did, he would know that he just broke my heart. So instead, I hug him. I hug him really tight, trying to keep myself from crying. After a couple minutes I pull myself together and pull away. Looking him in the eyes, "i love you too Ash." He smiles. "what do you want to watch now?" "i actually need to go." I don't actually, I just really feel like being alone right now. "aww" he drags out while giving me a pouty face. I smile "yeah I have homework." "well alright if you just have to." He sighs as I get up from the couch. I walk to the door and put my shoes on. He walks over a few seconds later. He pulled me into a tight hug and kissed the top of my head, for the first time in what feels like forever. "love you Em." "love you Ash." I walk out and head to my house.

"Emma? Are you alright?" My mom asked concerned. I kept my head down and tried my hardest to act like I was fine, but you know moms. "i'm alright, just tired." "Emma, somethings wrong. I've known you for seventeen years, you cant hide your feelings that easy." In that moment I just couldn't help but cry. I felt a tear roll down my cheek. My mom came and wrapped me in a hug and we just stayed there and I cried. "do you want to tell me whats the matter now?" My mom asks after about ten minutes. "not really. But I guess I will anyways." I sigh and head to the couch and my mom follows. "so..." I pause, thinking that if I tell her then someone actually knows I'm in love with him. I don't know if I'm ready for that. Also probably wouldn't be sleeping over at his house anymore. I decide that it's for the best if I just say another reason. One thing pops into my head and before I could think it through I just blurted it out. "someone is bullying me at school." I immediately regret the words that just came out of my mouth. What is wrong with me?? Why couldn't I have just said 'im just being dramatic today. Its that time and I really just need a hug." But nooo. "what?? How long has then been going on?" I face palm in my head and know that I'm completely screwed now. "not long." "ok well who is it and why are they bullying you?" "just some girl. She's probably just jealous or something." "has she hurt you physically?" Oh. Crap. "no." I shake my head as I look down. "she hasn't. She is just bringing my self esteem down a lot." I try and make that sound as believable as possible, I'm not sure that she bought it though. "honey, why didn't you tell me sooner?" "because its not a big deal." It so is. "have you told Ashton or Lizzie or anyone?" "no. Its too embarrassing. I don't want them to know." "ok honey. If anything else happens please tell me." "i will mom." I get from the couch and go up to my room. Once I made it to my room, I shut the door. I fell on too my bed and curled up into a ball. I then felt a hot tear roll down my cheek. I was in a distraught state, my breaths were getting heavier and my tears were falling down my cheeks like rain. I knew I was being dramatic, but I couldn't help it. Before I knew it I had fallen asleep with the thought of being nothing but Ashton's friend. forever. And only his friend, nothing more.