A pain worse than hell ( rias Gremory x abused and neglected reader )

Chapter 4 - worth

Right then .... This could be a shitshow ah whatever lets wing it

Your PoV Your apartment

It's been around a week since I've became a devil and I gotta say ... It's nice, for the first time in my life I've felt like people cared for me and whilst it's a nice feeling it also ... Worries me , I'm not used to this feeling and I feel like I should do something in return yet Rias keeps telling me I don't need to worry about that

I groggily sit up from my bed and remember that I was sleeping on the sofa

Me : oh yeah ... I forgot Rias was staying in my bedroom

For a moment I was considering going to wake her but I didn't want to enter uninvited in case she was nude ... Like she always is . Hoping she would wake up soon I began making a simple yet satisfying full English breakfast  . It isn't long before I feel someone tap my shoulder

Rias PoV same place same time

I tap y/n on the shoulder from behind and he spins around with a Yelp as his eye ignites

Y/n : Jeez Rias don't do that y-you scared me half to death
Me :sorry , I didn't want to distract you from breakfast
Y/n : it's fine just , p-please just speak next time

Short time skip to after breakfast still rias PoV

After finishing breakfast I turn to look at y/n and notice that he looks ...well ... Off

Me : y/n are you alright ?
y/n: m-me? Y-yeah I'm good , p-perfectly fine
Me : y/n please , I can tell when your lying , tell me what's up
Y/n : rias . I said .I'm fine .
Me : y/n you know I don't like to say stuff like this but I'm your master and if I remember correctly one of my previous orders was that you tell me if anything is wrong,so please just tell me .

Y/n lowers his head in shame before releasing an exasperated sigh

Y/n : your not gonna let this go are ya ?
Me :no I'm not . I've sworn to help you and I won't fail so soon .
Y/n : fine I'll spill it . Lately I've been observing the whole peerage and I've began to question something . Why do you keep me around ? I see all the others hunting down stray Devils and filling out contracts but me , well ... I've done nothing . No hunting , no contracts , all I've done is drag you down I literally kill the mood every time I enter the room because no matter how hard I try I just can't be happy , I just can't . it's like my emotions are eating away at my soul .

He sighs

Y/n : you'd probably be better of banishing me and letting me become a mindless stray at least then I'd be insane instead of depressed

Y/n PoV

After my little monologue I felt a sting on my face , rias had just slapped me

Rias : you idiot ! You really think your worthless !? no one and I mean no one is worthless in this peerage and that includes you . You may not see it but literally everyone in the peerage looks up to you , they all have demons in their pasts and the way you act around them , the way you keep pushing on , shows them that these demons can be conquered , even if the way you act around them isn't how you truly feel you still give them hope ,hope that there is light at the end of the tunnel , hope that they will see a brighter day , so please don't ever think that your worthless , you bring more to this peerage than you could possibly imagine . And y/n truth be told , you give me a sense of worth as well , sure it's tough and sometimes  I may feel like I'm not doing enough but the fact that I can help you , the fact that I see grow more and more every day is amazing . Being able to piece someone so pained , so broken , back together brings me more joy  than I even thought a person could feel . So please , stay . Not just for me but for all of us .

How do I even respond I ...I don't know

Me : rias I-I'm sorry it's just , every time I try to give myself any credit at all it's like there's a voice in my head telling me I don't deserve to be happy .

Rias suddenly pulls me into a tight embrace

Rias : then please , let me help take the voices away
Me : a-alright

After awhile we separate and rias begins to speak again

Rias : whilst I'm on the topic of support I need to say your combat prowess has grown significantly , your attacks have become incredibly unpredictable and I've never seen someone with so much evasiveness the only thing holding you back is that your body is hanging on by a thread , it seems like your soul is the only thing keeping it together , one hit and it'd be game over but I'd like you to follow me we're going to get you a weapon that could remedy this issue .
Me : a-alright

Aaaand done ,yeah yeah I know this chapter's a bit on the short side ( only 912 words) but hey I'm rusty . And as for your new weapon , all I'm gonna say is that I've been playing devil may cry five a hell of a lot .

Anywho im gonna vanish now , toodles