Lacuna || H.S.

chapter three

The problem with my mindset is that it's so hard to get out of. As soon as you realise we're all working to end up in the same place, nothing can ever satisfy you. It's shit. I need some way to spend my time though since apparently buying a van, smoking dope and driving around Australia isn't acceptable.

My boss doesn't like me. I'm not sure whether it's because I was two minutes late to my second shift, because i forgot to charge three dollars extra for a fried egg or just because she's a virgo. It feels like she's always glaring at me for no real reason. If I hadn't've learnt not to pay attention to other people's eyes on me, my hands would constantly be shaking.

Before I moved to the city I worked in this little Chinese restaurant. It sucked having to leave that behind. Especially my co worker cha. She's twenty eight and from the Philippines and she has one of the biggest hearts of anyone i've ever met. The city will never really be able to replace small towns. All of the people are different and I can't see it ever feeling like home.

My co worker now is fucking annoying. Her names Jan which apparently is short for Janiffer because her parents wanted to be special. She doesn't really know how to be quiet and I swear I know everything she's ever done in her life. I don't mind a brief history if it's interesting but I really don't need to know the date you first cut your own bangs. At least she takes the orders and let's me serve when it's busy.

I love mindless things like setting tables and cleaning the face of the fridge. They're tasks that allow me to drift off but are still useful enough to warrant getting paid. It's quite therapeutic watching something go from disgusting to pretty.

Jan's talking to customers and there's no orders for me to take out so I let the rag glide across the wood of the table. The restaurant is fancy but not to the point where we have to wait on the customers for their every need. If you want to order, you actually have to leave your seat.

I'm also allowed to serve alcohol. Since Jan isn't eighteen yet, I have something to brag about. It's not like they're that strict about it though. You can't even touch anything in a bottle shop without being yelled at but here we divvy out things like it doesn't even matter.

Alcohol laws are funny. If there's people who didn't have their first drink between fourteen and seventeen, they'd be the minority. I'm not sure what authorities think they gain by having all of the laws. Maybe it's so that they can feel better about themselves. I guess that way they can say they've done everything in their power to help people make better choices. Getting drunk is only really fun when it's illegal and even then, after the first few times the thrill dissipates.

"Venus, you can go now." Maurice my supervisor informs me. She's alright. I don't have all that much to do with her considering she's usually out the back making garlic bread and she did bandage my finger when i cut it on the dish scrubber.

I nod at her, finishing up setting the table before taking off my apron and hanging it on my hook. Jan's already left, probably to meet with her boyfriend who's three years older than her and finished with school. It's obviously different since she is legal but i don't know why you'd want to date someone in high school when you're in uni.

"Bye." I say to Maurice as I leave. I'm not that far from my house so I decide to walk today. Sometimes I take a bus or even a taxi if i'm feeling extra rich. It's 4pm and the suns right in the spot that catches your eye no matter which way you turn. All I have on me is a water bottle with about twenty mills left in it and my phone.