His Best Friend - jfg

chapter 9

talia
6:14pm
my room door locked, my knees to my chest, my heart felt empty. i let him go that easily, i had walked out and that could've been the last time i had seen him. i let it all go, what was i thinking?

i hadn't moved from my position when i made it home from walking. my eyes puffy, my breathing slow, my phone off.
why the fuck did he have to be so bipolar?

jack
8:22pm
i wanted to see her bad, i fucked up. i know i did, i blame myself for overreacting and not talking to her about it.

why is it always my fault,
i go crazy about her.

why, i had never acted like this before?

only once, in junior year. a guy, ryan oliver, had tried to sleep with tali. i can't imagine her with any other guy, it would kill me to ever see her with somebody else.
i had gotten out of my car and went to target. i had to pick up a few things for my house and myself. i had grabbed a cart and pushed it to the home goods section.

i grabbed a pillow and two towels because i had  lost the fluff in my other pillow, just like how i lost the fluff in my life. i sighed and pushed my cart to the razor section. i parked my cart on the side and grabbed the razor i normally use but i had broken mine. i got up and bumped into someone, "oh, hey sam!"

"don't." he spat.
"okay, what the fuck did i do to you?"
"does it matter? think again gilinsky." he walked away glaring at me as johnson had followed behind him.
"johnson, c'mon."
"jack, give up. you just did some stupid shit and everyone doesn't like you right now."

"is talia okay?"
"she should be the least of your concern." he spat following sammy into another aisle.

i had gone into the grocery aisle to look for more tea bags that were actually to my liking. i passed by the snack aisle, it had reminded me of her. she loved candy and her favorite snack were the little fudge stipe cookies. ever since high school, she'd love them especially with a glass of warm milk late at night.

talia
8:30pm
sitting on the couch, watching zac & mia on hulu, eating fudge striped cookies seemed like my only escape. zac and mia, were like jack and i. waiting until our relationship was going to be better, like something was always in the way.

"we're home." johnson had sing-singed.
sam and johnson went to fetch more groceries and what not, plus sammy needed more more shampoo.

"you didn't tell me what you wanted/needed so i kinda just guessed." sammy said handing me a bag of snacks and toiletries.
"give me some fudge stripes." johnson had said scrambling over me just to get some.
"we saw jack." sam said softly, as he sat next to me.
"i don't care about him right now. you guys are the two guys i need the most right now and i'm spending my time with you." i sighed, i knew i was lying to myself.

i miss jack, him and i had gotten a long better than anyone else. we were inseparable but this time i don't know if we'll ever go back to each other.

jack
9:05pm
it killed me not being able to see her, my friends hated me and i just wanted to see her, hold her and just kiss her. i had finished putting all my groceries away and everything i had bought for the house in its place. i sat down on my couch, looking up at the ceiling.
i sighed, "hey siri, play." a couple seconds later, the loudest silence by maurice moore began to play.

I'm in love with her, okay? If you're looking for the word that means caring about someone beyond all rationality and wanting them to have everything they want.

no matter how much it destroys you, it's love! And when you love someone, you just, you don't stop, ever.
Even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy.

Even then, especially then! You just, you don't give up because if I could give up, if I could just, you know, take the whole worlds advice and-and move on and find someone else that wouldn't be love! That would be, that would be some other disposable thing that is not worth fighting for!

i love natalia rose wilkinson and i cant stop. even when i don't know what to do, even when it destroys me.