Waiting Game

Chapter 8

I laid in the futon bed idly, sprawled across it and staring at the ceiling in aimless consideration.

'What do I do?' I repeated in my head like a mantra. 'Do I just go up there and hope for the best? Do I just ignore the subject until someone asks about it, after they've calmed down of course, or do I immediately begin explaining my predicament?'

Complications such as this could never have been foreseen by someone like me. A Genin, born from a civilian family, doing the impossible? That would be a joke that no one would take seriously.

I didn't know what to do.

And that scared me.

I have always been used to either having planned out scenarios that would be probable for me to encounter, or been able to quickly think of an appropriate response to a real-time scenario. But... what is the appropriate response? 'What do I do?!'

This both scared me, and frustrated me. Anxiety ate away at my entire body with an unsettling sensation. I didn't like it; I wasn't even remotely used to it.

I had to let it out somehow, so I took my pillow and shoved it onto my mouth. And screamed. Thankfully, it was enough to muffle the sound of my voice even to my own ears.

That felt better. Much better.

Taking the pillow out of my face, I sighed. 'This is too much for me, for anyone, to bear...' I didn't like the way my thoughts were going, so I began sorting through them.

'I came back for Sakura, and I'm not planning on leaving for a long time.' That was settled. I wasn't going anywhere without her. Calmly, I went on. 'And now I have to explain to her that I actually didn't stay dead. But how? What am I supposed to say? What do I do- no. Rewind.' I took a deep breath. 'Now I am obligated to explain to her, and the others, what happened to me after I died. And how I came back.'

That was better. I went on, 'I will explain to them that I had been aware that something was wrong with me all throughout the boat ride, and then realized the severity of my situation just before Zabuza had appeared. I then died there, and I could feel it.' I remembered, vividly, the sensation of Death's cold yet comforting arms wrapping around me and trying to bring me away from my corpse. 'But I didn't allow it, and I was stuck in that purgatory, as a ghost or ghost-like-being. I then refused to just stay behind as a ghost and forced myself back to life, for lack of a better explanation.'

That would work; there was simply nothing else to tell them except for the lackluster truth... unless I decided to act as if I had never come back to life, and worked as a behind-the-scenes teammate. Disguised, just in case any of them ever got hurt and needed an extra player in the game.

Two drastically different ways to go on with my life; each choice was on the opposite end of the spectrum.

But, for my conscious and the morale of the people around me, I decided to go with the first choice; to be honest and reveal myself to the other Genin. They deserved to know the truth.

Especially Sasuke; he's grown up knowing lies from the Hokage. He should have at least one word of truth in his life...

With yet another deep breath, I slowly got out of my futon and deliberately spiked my chakra in an Shinobi-code pattern(- ... ..- -... .- -.- .. / -.-. .- .-.. .-.. ...); this would get Kakashi's attention even if it wasn't in a code. Within a few more moments of silence, the clicking of Kakashi-sensei's crutch(which I had grown faintly accustomed to) had made it's way to my ears. I sighed before straightening my back; I needed to appear calm and collected so that Kakashi wouldn't have any doubts about allowing me to see the Genin.