Before I Go

fifth

"WHAT?! NO!? BAEKHYUN!! NO THIS ISN'T TRUE!!! HE'LL WAKE UP! LET GO!! HE'LL WAKE UP!! HE'LL NEVER LEAVE ME! HE WILL NOT LEAVE ME!!!" Chanyeol cried.

"Sir, calm down. There's nothing we can do about it. He's gone, and he won't come back," The lady in white suit said, while covering Baekhyun's body with white cloth.

He's gone.

"Hyung," Kyungsoo and Jongin said while approaching Chanyeol. They hugged him and just let him cry on their shoulders.

"H-he's gone.." Chanyeol sobbed.

Chanyeol realized how his husband was badly hurt.

"Chanyeol, he could've died yesterday or before we arrived, as you can see, he became thin. Thinner than before. His body could've just give up. But before he goes, he wanted to see you one last time,"

Chanyeol looked at Baekhyun's now covered with white blanket body through the mirror.

Tears again escaped from his eyes.

Kyungsoo and Jongin hugged him.

"You will just realize the person's worth the moment he's gone.." Kyungsoo said and Chanyeol cried even more.

"I've loved him even before I left him, and leaving him was the biggest mistake I have made in my 25 years of existing."

"You just realized that you love him so much? That you're stupid because you left him?" Jongin asked but he didn't answer.

He hates to admit it. But yes, he is guilty. Because of the fact that because of him, his husband, his life, his world, his everything, is gone and will never come back.

Kyungsoo separated from the hug, he grabbed an envelope that is neatly folded from his pants and gave it to Chanyeol.

"Wh-what's this?" Chanyeol asked.

"Just read it," Kyungsoo ordered, amd he and Jongin left.

Chanyeol sat on a chair nearby, opened the enveloped and read the letter.

Chanyeol,

I'm a hundred percent sure that if you're reading my letter right now, I'm probably gone. I'm sorry if I had to leave early. I'm sorry for everything.

Exactly a year ago, you left me alone. I didn't know the exact reason, but I really think that I deserved it, and exactly a year after, here I am, lying on this hospital bed, with wires and stupid machines making me live, writing a letter to you.

Chanyeol, I never got the opportunity to say these words to you. Chan, I love you. So much. More than anything. More than my life. I'm sorry if I couldn't be perfect. But always remember, even though I'm gone, I'll always love you, even from afar. Even if we're not together.

I'm so sorry for everything that I've done. Even though I don't know exactly what have I done. Chanyeol, thank you for loving me. Thank you for making me feel loved. Thank you for being my life, my world. I couldn't ask for more. Thank you, I'm sorry, I love you, my jagiya. ♡

Love,
Baekhyun♡

Chanyeol opened his eyes, seeing the pastel blue paint that covered the four walls of him and and his deceased husband.

He turned his alarm off and looked at the date.

June 14. 6:30 am.

Exactly a year after his husband died.