Before I Go

Shot II: part one

It's been 2 years since Baekhyun passed away, and Chanyeol hates to admit it but, he still missed Baekhyun.

Chanyeol wakes up, eyes red, done with another round of crying.

He stood up, stretching his arms, while scanning the same old room Baekhyun and Chanyeol used to share.

He stared at their portrait, smiled bitterly, as he wiped the tears that came out from his eyes, "Baekhyun-ah, I miss you..."

He grabbed his rilakkuma stuffed toy that Baekhyun used to hug. "I miss you, Baekhyun... so much..."

It's June 14. Baekhyun's death anniversary. Their wedding anniversary.

He wiped his tears, grabbed his things, took a bath, and went out.

Flashbacks started to take over Chanyeol's head.

"Chanyeol, I want that!!" Baekhyun pointed at the stuffed corgi inside the claw machine

"Hm?" Chanyeol asked.

"That one!!" he pointed at the corgi.

"Want me to get it for you?" Chanyeol asked and Baekhyun nodded furiously.

They are at the arcade for their date and Baekhyun wants the corgi.

"Araseo," Chanyeol smiled and kissed Baekhyun's forehead.

After a few tries, the claw finally grabbed the corgi tight, not letting it go. Baekhyun's eyes sparkled.

Chanyeol stared at his boyfriend, smiling.

Baekhyun immediately hugged the stuffed toy and Chanyeol chuckled.

"I'm gonna name you.... Chanyeollie..." Baekhyun said and Chanyeol laughed.

"Why Chanyeollie?" Chanyeol asked.

"Because it's a big puppy, and you're like him," Baekhyun smiled at Chanyeol, his eyes forming crescents.

"Oh God, why is he so cute?" Chanyeol mentally asks himself.

Baekhyun is adorable in Chanyeol's eyes even if sometimes, he is childish.

Chanyeol is now in front of the flower shop.

"Annyeonghaseyo, ahjussi, it's me, Chanyeol, I went here the other day and I came to pick up the flowers," Chanyeol greeted the old man who is running the flower shop.

"Ah, yes... Park Chanyeol... for... Park Baekhyun?" The ahjussi asked.

Chanyeol nodded, "Yes, for my husband... I will pay him a visit later."

"Oh, I am sorry for asking," The ahjussi said.

Chanyeol laughed, "Ne, it's fine." Then, he smiled.

The ahjussi handed him his flowers and then he went to the cementery.

Once he found Baekhyun's grave, his tears immediately flowed.

"H-hello, Baekhyunnie... Happy Anniversary t-to us..."

He looked up, preventing the tears flow from his eyes.

"A-are you enjoying y-your stay there in heaven? If n-not, y-you can come back to me anytime...."

He sat down, placing the flowers beside his husband's name.

"I-it's been 2 years... but i-i'm still guilty of what I did. I'm so sorry, Baekhyun. I shouldn't have ran away from you. I should have stayed. I'm such an idiot for leaving you. Baekhyun, I miss you, so much. I miss you laugh, I miss your voice, I miss our jamming sessions, I miss your whines, I miss you. Baekhyun, I want to see you again..."

Chanyeol sighed and continued, "Jongin and Kyungsoo? They're already married and they already have an adoptive son. He's Kyungin. He's adorable and hyper. When they adopted him, I immediately thought of you. I remembered that you like kids, right? and we used to dream about having our own children? I-it's just sad that... y-you had to leave early and l-leave me.."

"Remember your daily letters during lunch? I still have them all. I still read them everyday. Remember my rilakkuma stuffed toy that you used to hug? I still hug it everyday. Remember the corgi stuffed toy I got you? It's still on our bed. Remember the guitar you gave me? It's still there. Remember the blue sweater you got me for our first anniversary? I still wear it. You also have yours, right? I wish we could still use it together. I can picture us walking, wearing those sweaters, while hand in hand. B-but guess what? I-it w-won't happen again..." He smiled at the memories that is impossible to happen.

"Baekhyun-ah, I miss you so so much. Today is our anniversary, right? I have a request..." he said and sighed.

"As your gift, could you please come back to me?" Chanyeol asked.

The wind blew and it felt like someone is hugging him.

It started to rain.

"Baekhyunnie, I have to go now, I will visit again soon, I promise." Chanyeol said and smiled.

"I love you, Baekhyun. See you soon."

When he arrived at their house, he's surprised that the Kim couple is there.

"What? This is our bestfriend's house too, you know?" Kyungsoo raised an eyebrow.

"Hello to you too, Kyungsoo." Chanyeol chuckled.

Chanye knelt in front of someone and said, "Hello there, little Jongin." He said and Kyungin laughed.

"Hi, Chanyeol-hyung!! I missed you!!" Kyungin hugged Chanyeol and he had no other choice but to carry him.

"Did you went to Baekhyun-hyung?" Kyungin asked.

Chanyeol smiled at him and nodded.

"I want to visit Baekhyun-hyung too!"

Kyungsoo and Jongin looked at each other. Then they looked at Chanyeol.

"Sure," Chanyeol said.

"Can dad and papa go too?" Kyungin asked and he nodded.

Chanyeol placed Kyungin on the sofa and he went to his room and changed.

"So, what brings you here today?" Chanyeol asked while arranging the food Kyungsoo is preparing.

"We paid a visit. According to the caretaker, you are not coming out of your house for days. we were worried that's why we're here," Kyungsoo said.

"Thanks," Chanyeol said.

"Come on, let's eat. Jongin, Kyungin-ah! Come here now, we're going to eat!" Kyungsoo called Jongin and Kyungin who are playing at the living room.

"I wish Baekhyun was here." Chanyeol thought.

There was no single moment that he hadn't thought of Baekhyun. Everywhere reminds him of his deceased husband. There was no helping it. He misses Baekhyun.

"Chanyeol-hyung, eat." Jongin said because Chanyeol wasn't eating. He was just staring at the food.

"Oh, sorry. I suddenly thought of someone." Chanyeol said.

"Baekhyun?" Kyungsoo asked.

Chanyeol nodded.