Stormy

Chapter 13

"Cause it comes and goes in waves... it always dooooooes....it always does. We watch as our young hearts fade, into the flooood. Into the flood. And the freedom, of falling, the feeling I thought was set in stone. It slips through, my fingers and I'm trying hard to let go. It comes and goes in waves..." As I finish the song, Mr. Alders takes a few notes and then looks up to me: "You should work a little more on your breathing. And also, you have to put in even more emotion. I'm not completely buying it at the moment. It's good, Julie, but I know that you can do better. You know that you have to give it your all. If you wanna do it professional one day, you basically have to open your heart to each song for your listeners to be able to do the same. Think about what the song means to you, create a story for yourself. There's no need to tell it in words, but you have to convey the emotion to your listeners. Otherwise, no one will believe your message." "Alright, I will work on that.", I reply. "Prepare this song for next time again, please. I would like to keep track on your improvements. And I'd also like for you to finish your analysis on the song's rhetorical and stylistic devices when it comes to the lyrics. Any questions?", he asks. "No, Mr. Alders. Thanks for the feedback.", I say, a little tired from all his critique. "You're welcome. I'll see you next week, Julie.", Mr. Alders answers and shakes my hand. He then gets up and leaves the room to attend the teacher conference of the vocalist department. I stay seated for a little while longer, take a deep breath, before I finally get up to put my guitar into the case and grab all my stuff to leave the room. Sometimes it's hard to take in all the criticism. Even though he only tries to push me to be the best I can. Suddenly, I hear a voice behind me: "Heeyyy! Looks like you've had a rough day today. What's up?" It is Martijn. He's back from Miami. I turn around and see him in the door, smiling: "Hey Martijn." He enters the classroom and stops me from packing all my stuff. "Play it for me again.", he says. "What?", I ask. "The song. Waves. I'd like to hear it again.", he says in a calm voice. "But I... It's not that good yet. I'm still working on it. As you've probably heard.", I explain and shrug. Martijn takes off his jacket, puts his backpack down on the floor and sits down right next to it: "That is why I would like to hear it again. You need some confidence. It makes your voice a lot more beautiful." "Okay.", I sigh and grab my guitar again. "Wait. Before you play it... I think your teacher is right. You need to know what the song means to you. Would you like to tell me? Sometimes it helps to share a vision.", Martijn says. I sit down on the floor next to him and start to think. "The lyrics are special to me.", I say, "I know they have been written about looking for this feeling of excitement that we have somehow lost on the way here. I can feel that. But there's more to the song. I connect it with my parents and the last vacation we went on as a family before the start of my first year here. We've been to France and we did a road trip along the coast. It was probably the best two weeks I've had for a long time. And the song was the soundtrack to it." "That sounds beautiful. You know, music to me is all about emotions. It is all that matters. What you feel while composing. What you feel while performing. What you feel while listening. The moments you can create. This is why I love music so much.", Martijn explains. "You know, it feels good to talk about music with you. It inspires me.", I say with a little smile. "Same here. Do you wanna sing it again? If you want to, I can play the guitar for you. I know you can do it.", he says. "Okay. I'll try.", I answer and hand him my guitar. Martijn carefully takes it out of my hands and starts to play. I close my eyes and start to sing. Halfway through the song, I open my eyes and catch Martijn's gaze. He gives me an encouraging smile and I keep pushing my voice for the climax of the song. As I finish the last few lines, Martijn stops playing and lets me sing just acapella. "See? I told you, this is amazing. If you do it just like this, he will be completely convinced. I promise, Julie. You're doing good, really.", Martijn smiles. "Thank you. Honestly. That means a lot.", I exclaim. Martijn hands me my guitar and gets up: "You deserve it. But hey, I actually came here for another reason." "What's the reason?", I ask curiously. "I promised you to make up for these lonely studio sessions.", Martijn says and gives me a little smirk, "And you look like you need it." "What do you have planned?", I laugh. "Are you scared of heights?", he asks. "Well.... No, not really I guess.", I answer, "But why are you asking?" "Just trust me.", Martijn says, "Meet me in the city center at 6pm?" "Sure thing.", I answer, "Can't wait." "Great.", Martijn says, then gives me a hug and leaves. That guy is full of surprises, I think to myself, then I leave the classroom myself, feeling way better than before. I go back to Emma and I's room, put my school stuff away and lay down on my bed for a little while, taking a moment to myself. Sometimes, the days at the academy are just overwhelming. Ups and Downs. I really do enjoy them though. Mr. Alders is a great teacher, I have learnt so much from him in my first year. He is one of the most demanding teachers of our department, but he believes in me. That is why he keeps pushing me. Sometimes it's just hard to take in all the criticism. That is why you need to have your friends as a support system and I have literally found the best friends I could ask for here at the school. It's an amazing creative place, where everyone shares the same passion for music. Meeting people like Emma, the other girls from my friend group or Martijn has really sparked my creativity. It's exactly where I wanna be.