Anthony Ramos x Reader

Back On the Bus

So turns out that we weren't staying in California. We all got back on a bigger bus, the whole cast.
Meaning, I was stuck on that bus with Anthony and Jasmine. For hours, days, weeks, months.
I fell in love with him, but I'm just a fan. In fact, I should be home at school!
I sat down next to Lin. He smiled gently at me and said "When we go back to New York, you can always go back home, you know that right?"
I nodded. "I just figured if I stick around enough maybe you'd help me with my career..."
"What do you have in mind?" He sounded excited now.
"Well, help me get casted, or even write a musical, ya know?"
Lin smiled. I like his smile.
Everyone was sitting around talking about what everyone missed. Then someone played music. It was just a pop station ((a/n this takes place in 2019 now, if it didn't before idk, but that means it's 2019 pop music)) and i couldn't even tell what was playing. Until Daveed said "Hold in, the Jonas Brothers are still together?!" Sucker was playing.
"No, I think they split up then got back together." Lin said.
I looked at Anthony who quickly turned his head. He was looking at me.
Jasmine is in the other side of the room not paying attention.
Everything hurt. I wanted to cry.
*Time skip*

I fell asleep for a while on the bus. My sleep schedule has been literal shit lately. I got like a solid 4 hours of sleep over the last 3 days. Today I got like 2.

When I woke up, everyone was basically in a circle on the floor. I sat up, rubbed my eyes, fixed my hair into a messy bun, and walked over. I sat next to Lin who wrapped his arm around me as I yawned. Pippa smiled at me. From the corner of my eye I saw Anthony look down.

"So what's going on here?" I said, yawning and laying on Lin's lap.

"Vocal notes." Lin started playing with my hair. I smiled. 

I noticed the radio still going in the background, but now it was playing Trust Fund Baby by Why Don't We. I shot up and screamed. "Holy- I LOVE THIS SONG." 

I started singing really loud, climbing on then benches and being a total over the top fan girl. Pippa started dancing with me as a joke and Daveed started recording. When I saw him, i ran over to him and smacked his phone out of his hand. Everyone was laughing.

"Who wants lunch?" Jonathan randomly yelled. Everyone looked at him, then each  other, and burst out laughing.

"On that note, im going to get dressed." I said, grabbing a bag and walking into the bathroom.

"Ironic, you just HAVE a Why Don't We hoodie with you." Jasmine said, trying to start conversation, i just nodded.

We went to a hella fancy restaurant. We all sat down. I sat next to Lin, but Anthony sat next to me. I couldn't get up. It was so awkward. 

Everyone was talking besides me and Anthony, but one one seemed to notice the silence. We sat there, both looking down at our feet in silence.

"I know what Jasmine said to you. I don't know why she said that." He finally said. He looked up at me and looked back at him. Staring into his eyes made me feel safe again, made me feel like he wanted me. I felt myself slowly getting lost, I couldn't help myself. I kept looking deeper and deeper into his eyes, it was like a spell that cannot be broken.

"Listen-"

I finally blinked and pulled myself out of that pit. 

"Don't waste my time Anthony." I got up and started to walk out.

"Hey y/n where you going?" Lin called after me.

"I need some air."

I went outside and sat down against the wall. I was alone for about 5 seconds before Anthony walked out. He sat down next to me.

"She-"

"Will you stop?" I snapped at him. "I get it, you and her aren't together, you want to be with me, but tomorrow that will change. First a hug, then a kiss, whats next Anthony? You gonna like be with me and fuck her or something?"

He looked like he wanted to say something but couldn't think of anything. He just sat there, looking at the ground. 

"That's what I thought. Now leave me the fuck alone."

(a/n I feel like it has to be said that it will get better, I promise. This is an x reader and all they are doing right now is fighting. But it will get better.)

I got up and went back on the bus. I sat down and curled into a ball on the floor. Im so done.

*time skip to New York*

Apparently Lin has an apartment building in NYC that the whole cast stays in. He told me I could sleep where ever, so I slept in the room with Pippa, Renee, and sadly Jasmine. Pippa gave me her bed, but I told her i'd sleep on the couch. 

It was about 3 am and I sat on the couch with my earbuds in and hood up, sitting in the dark. My thoughts were racing. Me and Anthony haven't said a word to each  other since that day. And yet, he hasn't spoken to Jasmine either. 

I let out a deep sigh and pulled the blanket off my legs. I picked up a sharpie from my bag and a random left over napkin from dinner and wrote "Going for a walk at 3:08, if you see this at 7 am I might be dead. Call me."

I walked out of my room and walked very slowly past Anthony's room. Him and Jonathan had their own rooms. I don't know why, they just did. I wanted so badly to open the door and run into his arms. But I didn't. I went outside and started walking down the road. With all the light's and cars, it wasn't hard for me to see. But I kept looking down. 

My thoughts flooded my head and made it impossible to think of anything other then Anthony. I wanted him. But I couldn't. 

Or could I?

(a/n This story is getting a remodel after chapter 13, which is this chapter.  You will see this note again at the beginning of this story, at the end of chapter one.  My whole profile is getting a remodel. If you have read this before the remodel, do not worry, everything is still the same story wise. If you are reading this for the first time, nothing is different and you are not missing a thing. I hope you do enjoy whatever this is that I spend so much time on. ~Ash)