TWENTY FOREPLAY • ||J.Jackson x T.Shakur

S E S S I O N S I X

"Fears are nothing more than a state of mind"

-Napoleon Hill

As Amaru sat in his car several thoughts invaded his mind. Majority of them were negative which he expected, but a few positive affirmations made their rounds as well. He knew he had to go in there level headed, he had gained so much control over his anger now was not the time to relapse.

Amaru stepped out of his car hesitantly as he began to follow the withered concrete path that led to his aunt's house. He made it to the door, and knocked waiting for his aunt to appear. He usually want one to knock, he would have just made his way inside. This time he felt that knocking would be necessary, he was prolonging their meeting. The door opened in a swift movement, as he was faced with the warms smile of his aunt. He was pulled inside with a great hug. She had no problem being affectionate towards her nephew. She had raised him into such a great young man. She didn't know how he would handle today, but she knew she wouldn't  let him do it alone. Their moment of affection was interrupted by an unaccustomed voice was heard through the room.

"Rosa where do yo-", said the same woman who had abandoned Amaru those many years ago.

In continuation.

"So this weekend, what happened Amaru", Ada asked facing Amaru. She was anxious to uncover the mystery behind Amaru's meeting with his mother. She couldn't exactly tell how it had went based on his current facial expression, which was almost neutral

"So this is how it went down" he finally spoke, ready to get on with the story from this past weekend.

The energy in the room was charged as Amaru stared deep into the eyes of the woman who had once had given him away. Her eyes seemed dull as she stared at Amaru.

Interrupting the silence, Rosa lowly cleared her throat.

"Ok Afeni, pull up a chair, I want to give you the time to discuss the problems between the both of you, and settle any differences", Rosa said before giving Amaru a look of reassurance. She left the room closing the door behind her.

The atmosphere was tense as Amaru and Afeni  sat across from each other. Afeni couldn't believe how the similar facial features they shared. Amaru took to time to take in Afeni's appearance, he couldn't deny the uncanny resemblance.

After a prolonged moment of saturninely, Afeni finally decided to speak up, getting Amaru's full attention

"I would like to start off by saying, after we have this talk you don't have to like me nor agree to meet me again, all I ask for is your forgiveness", She spoke, she was yearning for forgiveness from the son she abandoned so many years ago.

Amaru simply nodded allowing her to go on. She took in a deep breath before she began to speak again.

"I met your father in high school, he wasn't necessarily the best person for me to be around, but there was something about him that drew me to him. My mother warned me some many times about him, but me wanting to do my own shit I payed her no mind.  He somehow convinced me to drop out of school because he felt as though I didn't have enough time for him, so And I did. One of the many things I regret doing was not finishing high school, but to Billy it was a waste of time.  After I dropped out, he convinced me to move in with him. My family didn't want anything to do with me, I couldn't blame the them. Billy was the one who introduced me to crack, he used my innocence to get me to do anything he wanted me to do. I went thru so much with your father, I thought it would stop when I got pregnant with you. It didn't, and my drug addiction got worse, I couldn't to an hour without a fix. I was able to stop it for the while I was pregnant with you, but as soon as I had you I went right back to it. You were such a beautiful baby, but Billy couldn't stand all the crying, and told me if I didn't get rid of you, he would hurt you. Of course with my inner problems and Billy's imposing threats, I felt as though  I wouldn't be a good mother to you, so I gave you away, and Amaru that was the biggest mistake I have ever made", She said tears were threatening to leave her eyes as she faced Amaru.