Day in the life of me

#AcePRIDE

**** talk of LGBTQ+****

Hello again everyone. I've forgotten if I've ever mentioned this before, but I'm Ace-sexua, meaning I don't feel sexual attraction to anyone or thing. That doesn't mean I don't find people attractive, I've meant a couple people who I think " hey they look nice." But I've never wanted to have/ engage in sex with that person. That being said, I'm not quite a fully grown woman, maybe when I get old I will want that? Maybe I'm not as physically mature as everyone else my age ( yes trust me I hear about IT way more often then I'd like too). These are all true facts but recently I was talking to some one on my track team who said some things that upset me. I writing about them hear because I'm almost 100 percent sure no body reads this anymore and I'm also pretty sure they don't have a Wattpad account anyway. For this story I will refer to them as E, to protect them. 

So it was raining so there was no throwing events going on except shot-put which I don't do anymore. I was sitting under the tent we had set up waiting for the four by one, eating nachos. And E come up and is sitting under the tent with me. I'm not sure how we got on the topic but, I think it was that we had a LGBTQ+ group meeting earlier that we where discussing. I mention that I'm ace and E says " I thought I was too until I meant my girl friend"

Chill, not discrediting me or anything. I then say, " I thought I was Bi because I had never heard of ace before 8th grade, and I wasn't really attracted to anyone so I assumed I was bi."

" your right but you never really know what you are until you try."

Wait hold up what's? Ok I don't think E was trying to be condescending but the way E said that hurt my feelings a little bit. So I said, " you're right maybe I'm just not as mature as the other kids in my grade, but currently I've never looked at some one and thought ' I want to bang that'" 

" I never thought that about any girl until I try one." Again I don't think they meant to hurt my feelings but this was like telling someone they couldn't like Taylor Swift music because they had never meant her or that I couldn't be ace because I've never had sex. 

So I tried changing the subject a little, " I suppose if I was married and that's what my husband really wanted, I would be ok with it but I don't need it or really care for the idea." 

You want to talk about a look of offense, " you shouldn't just do that, you should just because they want it. You NEED to enjoy it too." 

Well hell. I have a general fear of being told I have to like something. And I was slightly ticked at this point. " well I know what you're saying I didn't mean it like that, but I just personally don't need sex." Right about then they called for the four by one girls to go sign in so that's what I did. Leaving E isn't eh tent. 

Don't get me wrong. I understand where she is coming from but I'm just a little upset with how E said those things. It's like pine apple, I don't dislike it but I would never go out of my way to get it and I don't look for it. It rarely every crosses my mind. But for some people, pineapple is a must have and for others they like to have it some of the time. 

And as for the ' you've never had it how do you know you don't like it' people. It's not about if you alike it, there are Ace people who love having sex and have it every night. There are aces who wouldn't have sex if there life depended on it. Aces can still have sex, we just don't find anyone sexually attractive. 

And for people who still don't get it. I have never hugged a cactus but I'm pretty damn sure I'm not going to like it. I don't have any desire to hug a cactus but maybe after I'll want to hug a cactus every now and then. So how about you try it. Go hug a cactus so that maybe you'll want to hug another one. 

Really I guess, maybe I was just so wild up because this is the first Person outside of my friend group who didn't accept it. All my friends had accepted it. My family is chill I've told them they weren't against it. But the first person I really sat down and talked about it will outside of my friends jumped to offering an alternative almost before I could explain myself. And it hurt. Yes I'm probably being over dramatic and maybe I'm being sensitive, but I have a right to be sensitive when someone says something that hurt my feelings. I don't do it very often but I'm using that right right now to try and tell people. It is NEVER ok to try and 'fix' people's identities even if your trying to help. You can ask questions, but don't try and convince them they aren't what they are. You may mean well but sometimes it hurts the person a lot more then it helps. 

For the few of you who do read this, Thank you. I know this may seem small to you but, to me it's not. In the bigger picture it is small, and in a few years it might just seem like a scratch, but right now i want to try and stop it before it gets infected. 

So thank you for reading, 

Rose.