Free Falling

Chapter 8

Chapter 8

After Koz and I reach our release, I start hearing his soft snores beside me. I love you. He said I love you. As much as I wished that changed things, it doesn't. I know I won't be enough for him. Jeremy is dead and gone and I am still hearing his voice telling me I'm not enough. Not good enough. Not pretty enough. Not thin enough. I slowly slide out of bed and walk out to the back deck with the blanket that I keep at the foot of the bed. Sitting out there, I feel the tears start falling and the won't stop. I must have sat there all night, lost in my own thoughts. The sun has started coming up and I hear the patio door open and Koz comes out handing me a cup of coffee. "How long you been up?" he asked. "A while." I say. He didn't even realize I wasn't in bed last night. "Can you let Gemma know I won't be there today? I'm not feeling very well." I asked him. "Yeah. You okay?" he asked. "Yeah. Just a headache." I tell him. "Yeah. Okay. I'm heading there now. Call me if you need anything." he tells me. I just nod and look back out at the yard. Koz kisses the top of my head before he leaves.

Walking up to the office, Koz sees Gemma unlocking the door. "Where's our girl?" Gemma asked. "She's home. Not feeling too good. Said something about a headache." he tells her. "I'll have Chucky watch the office here in a little bit and go check on her." Gemma says. "Yeah. Thanks. She's just been off since that shit with the croweater." Koz tells her. "I'll talk to her." Gemma says and Koz walks to the garage to get to work.

Around lunch time, Gemma knocks on the door and gets no answer. She uses the key to get in and calls out my name. "Charley? Where are you baby girl?" she asked, walking through the house. Seeing me laying on the bed, she comes over to wake me up and I don't respond. Seeing a bottle of sleeping pills on the nightstand with a half empty bottle of Jack sitting next to it, she checks for a pulse before calling 911. Once the ambulance gets there, she calls Koz. "You need to get to St Thomas right now. Something's wrong with Charley." she says before hanging up and following the ambulance to St Thomas.

"Shit. I gotta go. Something's wrong with Charley." Koz says and Tig and Happy are right behind him. They rush to St Thomas and find Gemma in the waiting room. "What's wrong?" Koz asked as he runs up to Gemma. "I went to check on her and didn't get a response so I walked around the house and she was laying on the bed and was unresponsive. There was a bottle of sleeping pills on the night stand and a half empty bottle of Jack next to it. Koz, what the fuck happened this morning?" she asked. "I don't know. Things seemed fine last night. We talked and I told her that she was the only one that I wanted or needed. I fucking told her I love her. We went to bed and when I got up this morning she was on the back deck. I guess she had been there for a while but she wouldn't talk to me. Just told me she didn't feel good." he tells her.

"I'm looking for the family of Charley Landry?" the doctor says. Koz steps forward and says "I'm Dr Davis. Charley was unresponsive when she came in. We ran some tests and looking at the amount of alcohol she had in her system on top of the amount of sleeping pills that were with it, we have her sedated and keeping her on a 72 hour hold." Dr Davis says. "What are you saying?" Gemma asked. "We think she was trying to kill herself." the doctor said. All eyes go wide. "Fuck." Koz says. Tig gets in Koz's face and says "I told you to fucking fix this." Koz looks down and says "I'm trying." Tig pulls him into a hug and Koz is just in shock. "Can we see her?" Gemma asked. "Only a couple at a time. I'll show you the way. Koz heads towards my room with Tig right behind him.

Walking into the room, they see me laying in the hospital bed and see me with tubes running from my body. The steady beeping of the heart monitor is the only sound in the room. Koz walks over and sits in the chair next to me and whispers in my ear, "Please don't leave me baby. I need you. I love you so fucking much. Please don't leave me." Koz lets the tears fall while Tig just rubs his back for support.