Jigsaw

Spiders

The depth of the air,

As I'm sinking in despair,

The sounds get louder,

My demons getting prouder,

I feel a tightness in my chest,

My mental state's in regress,

My head's pounding with the stress,

I wish I could have less,

And I'm drowning in my tears,

Consumed by my fears,

About everything and anything.

I'm choking and my throat collapses on itself.

Crying out in pain is useless if I can't breathe,

So all I can do is seethe,

Goddammit, can't even rhyme,

My mind ain't sublime,

And I'm losing so much time,

Wasting my prime,

Don't even have a dime,

This is just an endless rant,

To say what I can't,

And to spill my thoughts,

And to fill blank slates,

With blood filled pain,

So I can gain,

The worst of my fears tell me to kill,

To scream shrill,

To climb into a mill,

To jump out the window sill,

To just end it all,

And let life fall,

But I know I'm worth something,

Or anything,

Never everything,

And this is just a useless rut,

So I don't spill out my gut.

Stop the voices in my head,

The ones wishing I was dead,

Go away, begone,

Far away into the dawn,

I don't want you, you don't want me,

Leave me be,

Let me alone,

I'll throw you out with a stone,

Stop, stop, stop,

Stop choking me down,

Stop closing me in,

Stop imploding me,

Stop tearing me from the inside,

Feasting on my fears,

Contaminating my tears,

Whispering in my ears,

Leave, leave, leave,

Before you make them grieve,

With the lies that I weave,

A spider caught in my own web,

Spinning endless threads,

And they're coated with blood droplet dew,

Sticky, sickly, but never sweet,

Trapping flies but leaving lies,

Endless spirals they tick and turn,

Until they have no choice but to burn,

Destroying what may be in their path,

For they face all my lies' wrath.