I am completely mad, Jungkook.
I sat in a lesson and giggled continuously, like a son, that is being tickled by his lovely daddy.
I know, it looked crazy, but... I don't know what was happening.
I watched you and giggled, and you looked at me with raised eyebrows and probably thought that something is wrong with me.
You're right, Jungkook.
Everything is wrong with me.
My tears ended, so I'm laughing now.
That's what you did to me, Jungkook.
I am waiting, sweetie.
I am waiting with grittened teeth.
I am waiting until it's midnight, and I can freely, slowly and unstoppably fly down from the fifth floor, like a feather, and land on mother earth, that loves me so much.
Views are running through my eyes.
Your disgusting hands under my shirt, your dispicable laugh, your brown eyes...
I won't let you live happily after my death.
White, folded and useless letter, that you will throw away after reading it, is resting in my pocket.
Oh!
It seems like I have tears left after all!
They are rolling down my blank cheeks, racing, until they land on a dirty material of my jeans.
One part of me wants you to come up and stop me, and the other builds a high brick wall inside of me, so you can't hop over it and make me rethink my final destination.
'Are you okay, Jimin?'
'Are you okay, Jimin?'
'Are you okay, Jimin?'
No, for the God's sake, no!
I am not okay, Jungkook, you hear me?
I'm not!
I am dead.
My wothless, ugly and tired body is empty for a long time now!
There is nothing left, Jungkook!
Nothing...
When I was little, I always dreamed of having a boyfriend, that would take care of me and love me, maybe even protect me from my father...
Jungkook, have you ever had dreams?
You see, I had...
It seems so simple, but...
Impossible.
Oh!
One hearbeat and here we are - two brown, scared and upset eyes are looking at me.
I can't believe it, Jungkook.
You pin me down to the cold ground with your strong body and look me deep in the eyes.
"What are you thinking?!" You whisper-yell.
I look at you.
I start sobbing and hitting your chest with my small fists.
"You did this to me, Jungkook! I want to die, disappear, vanish, eradicate, stop egzisting! Why are you here!? Let me die! Please, I beg you, let me die..."
Your sweet lips shut me up.
I feel heart in my throat.
Oh, I'm fine, Jungkook... I'm so fine...
