Spelled

9: Bumpkins, Toadstools, and Puppies...Oh My!

"Approach lost animals gently, so you don't scare them away. With the right touch, they'll follow you home forever."

—Bo Peep's Guide to Enchanted Animal Care
9

Bumpkins, Toadstools, and Puppies...Oh My!

A few hours' walk from the Bumpkins, my feet were killing me. I was used to wearing heels all the time—I lived in them—but this was the farthest I'd ever traveled, period. This was also the longest I'd ever gone without food. My stomach cramped around the nothingness. "I'm starving," I complained to no one in particular.
"Okay, well, I nominate you to find some food for us," Rexi said, still making sure to stay a few steps ahead.
I made a face at her green tunic. "Sure, I'll put that on my to-do list. Right under find parents, fix magic, and try not to end the world in a big ball of fire."
"Well, if you're hungry, you can always try one of the figs. They haven't killed your pet yet. Unfortunately." Rexi pointed to Kato, who was scarfing down more of the rotting fruit.
I wasn't that hungry.
Watching him whack the tree trunks with his spiky tail, I could see that my earlier observations had been spot on. He was getting bigger fast and wasn't a baby fuzz ball anymore. He was more like a gawky tween fuzz ball with paws the size of milk saucers. When he was done growing, he would be a big boy.
Rexi hollered from a little ways in front. "Hey, Dorkea."
I moved a little faster to hear better, and so I could smack her if the opportunity arose. "Excuse me...what did you say?"
Rexi coughed into her hand. "I said, 'Hey, Dorthea.'"
Yeah right.
"So I've always wanted to ask. What's the deal with that whole curse business anyway? Are you like a ticking time bomb now or something?" She matched my pace, then looked me up and down as if assessing my threat level.
She was the first servant to ever ask; everyone else had always kept their distance. Better safe than crispy, I suppose.
"It's possible." I gave her a sly smile. "So you probably better be careful and stop pixing me off."
Rexi snorted and rolled her eyes, her favorite mode of expression. "Bring it on. You look pretty harmless."
A blumerang bird flew directly between us, then stopped to stretch its gossamer wings on top of a giant purple-spotted toadstool a few yards away. Before it had a chance to take off again, the toadstool opened its cap and swallowed the bird whole. The only evidence that the bird had ever existed were two feathers floating to the base of the fungi.
Rexi laughed uncomfortably. I wondered if she was rethinking that whole "harmless" idea. I know I was.
I turned around, but something stood in my path. It was small, about the size Kato had started out as but definitely not the same type of creature. This one looked nearly identical to the golden retriever pups the game master raised in the kennels. It had its eyes down, its tail tucked under, and light yellow fur that looked so soft it begged to be touched.
Who could resist?
"Aww, aren't you just the cutest widdle thing?" I said, petting the pup. "Are you lost too, sweet pea?"
Kato made a gagging sound behind me.
I steadfastly ignored him. "Don't wisten to mean old Kato. He's just jealous 'cause he's a stupid beast and you're so much cuter."
Rexi made a gagging sound nearly identical to Kato's. "What is it with you and attracting useless furry things? Let's move. We're getting nowhere slow."
Whatever. I was a princess, supposedly a natural with small woodland creatures and the like—though I'd never figured out how to get any of the castle canaries to clean my room.
A distant rumbling snapped me to my feet. I looked to the sky. It was clear. Thunder heralded a storm. And a storm reminded me of...
Kato circled around me, growling as if he too sensed the danger approaching. We'd just lost whatever lead the cyclone had given us, and now it was time to go. Rexi and I made eye contact.
"We need a place to hide." She looked over her shoulder. "There!"
There was a dense grove of golden fig trees. The leaves were fuller than the other trees so far, creating a shiny canopy. They could keep us out of view if the witch came from overhead.
Kato's growl pitched lower, turning more intense.
I turned back to grab the puppy and make a run for the trees, but Kato hadn't been growling at the sky.
He stood between me and the puppy, back arched in a protective stance. The puppy was still small and fluffy—except for its ginormous batlike wings. That, plus its glowing demon-red eyes kind of ruined the whole cuddly effect.
"What the hex?" Rexi shuffled back, colliding with me.
Extending its leathery, black wings, the pup howled up at the suns. A chorus of howls replied.
"Great. I think it just called for backup," I said, looking around for the rest of the pack.
Thunder rumbled through the sky again, closer this time. The pup continued to howl, giving away our position.
Turning to make a run for the forest, a tree exploded into flames directly to my right. Smoke tendrils curled from the puppy's nostrils as it hovered a few inches off the ground.
I sighed. "Of course it's a fire-breathing, flying demon puppy."
Rexi looked back and forth between Kato and the puppy. "No fair. Why did we get stuck with the defective sidekick whose only special power is eating things?"
The howls were getting closer, but we couldn't go anywhere until this puppy was neutralized.
The dog's belly expanded, most likely gathering enough air to barbecue us. This was it. I'd avoided fire my whole life, and this was how the curse would come true. I was about to become the Girl of Emerald, bathed in flames.
Faster than my eyes could track, Kato whipped around, using his barbed tail to smack the puppy into the air like a ball. The fur ball flew...right into the purple-spotted toadstool. The puppy didn't even have a chance to look surprised before the giant mushroom gobbled it up and burped out a spare piece of fluff.
"I stand corrected," Rexi admitted.
Astonished, I looked at our super-awesome sidekick. "Let me guess, you meant to do that."
Kato shrugged his feathered wings modestly.
The approaching howls broke off any further praise I might have given him. Looking to the sky, I could just make out the horde of flying puppies and their leader, riding on a thundercloud—the Gray Witch.
"We've gotta move," I said and sprinted past the flaming tree. The gold dripped off the leaves like wax from a candle.
The thunder boomed directly overhead. Once we reached the grove of figs, I figured we'd be safe and unseen.
One problem: you don't necessarily need to see something to destroy it.
Stormballs crashed through the golden canopy, creating large holes that allowed light to filter in. So far, they were way off target, but all it took was one lucky shot, right?
In between the booms of thunder, Griz cackled and taunted, "Come out, come out, wherever you are. I have a present for you."
Yeah, like that was going to happen. Did she think I would yell out, "Ooohh goodie, a present! Gimme, gimme"? I might be shallow, but I'm not dumb. The gift thing may have worked once, but if I fell for it a second time, I deserved to be zapped into oblivion.
Rexi motioned for me and Kato to stop. "Maybe if we stay put, Griz will keep flying ahead," she whispered.
Stormball after stormball crashed through the grove, then nothing. After a solid minute with no new strikes, I whispered, "Maybe she's moved on."
There was a slight rustle in the trees just behind us. I looked up and found tiny pinprick holes appearing in the canopy.
What in Grimm's name was going on now?
Stupidly, I went over to investigate. Face tilted to the sky, I felt a drop on my cheek. I hissed quietly in pain because it burned. Like acid. Somehow the witch was making it rain acid, and it was coming down through the trees. A yip right above me. So not Griz, but the puppies.
I really didn't want to think about where the acid was coming from. I prayed it was drool. The alternative was too gross to think about.
The puppies spread out in a scatter pattern, making their acid melt through the trees. Rexi's eyes bugged out and she made weird hand signals.
I mouthed, What?
She exhaled heavily and shook her head. We have to move, she mouthed back.
Right then, some splatter landed on Kato's wing. With a mighty roar, Kato let the world know his pain.
And our location.
I didn't think; I just moved, shoving Kato out of the way. Milliseconds later, a stormball crashed in the exact spot where he had been standing.
"I see you," Griz singsonged directly above us on her cloud.
"Go!" Rexi grabbed my hand and took off.
The world became a blur of gold as leaves whipped past my face. The trees behind us burst into flames, driving us forward. The grove was getting lighter, a sure sign that it was coming to an end.
I pointed to the tree line in front of us. "Split up as soon as we're out!"
Rexi nodded. We broke through the trees, and I aimed to veer right. My foot hit air.
We had run off a cliff.