Burning Heart - Bucky Barnes x Reader

Part 5

Hey there!

I know, I know. It's been a while since I've updated this series, but I've been super busy the past few weeks. I finally managed to sit down and write part 5! Let me know what you think! Happy reading!

1,323 words

Monday, January 22nd, 1940

It was all a blur from when you grasped the machine gun, to after you had positioned yourself opposite Bucky. Of course, you knew how to handle a gun despite it being frowned upon in the society you lived in, but that wasn’t the issue. After hearing the flareups, you and Bucky were ready for impact, but nothing happened. It had been at least fifteen, maybe twenty, minutes of stealthily wandering around and it was as silent as a gated community in the dead of night.

With a quick side glance toward Bucky, you lowered you gun but kept your eyes and ears open. You only heard Bucky’s clothing shift as he followed your actions, lowering the weapon to rest on his hipbone. You released a sharp breath through your nose and blinked a couple times before stepping forward to look through the thin material of the tent.

“What the hell?” Was all you heard Bucky say from behind you as you very cautiously moved the entrance curtain aside and stepped out. “Wait, (Y/N). We don’t know what’s out there.”

You stepped forward, saying nothing as you checked to make sure your gun was still rested against your upper thigh, with your hands gripping its side in case it needed to be used suddenly. You whirled around, allowing your eyes to flit across every surface of the forest and camp around you before turned back to face Bucky. “That makes no sense,” You whispered as loudly as you could without straining your throat.

The use of whispering brought a small smile to Bucky’s face – heat of the moment – before he cleared his mind of unnecessary thoughts and followed you out into the now dark camp. The only light provided was a lamp at every entrance of each tent, and the small candles lit inside the tents that had seemingly been abandoned.

“Bucky, the explosions…” Your whisper slowly died out throughout your words and became a quiet strain as you trailed off.

“I heard ‘em too, Doll. And you’re right, it makes no sense, but we’ll figure it out.” His gaze shifted to you and you swallowed the mucus coating your throat before nodding slowly; hesitantly.

“We should,” You swallowed again, “go back and get packs for ammo and food and water,” You suggested, and Bucky nodded slowly. You could practically see the gears moving inside his brain. He must have had something else on his mind if it was taking him this long to process what you said.

As if reading your mind, he spoke, “(Y/N)…”

You turned back towards him and rose your eyebrows, urging him to continue.

“How do you know how to shoot a gun?”

The question was like a punch to your gut and you ignored the way your muscles contracted, and your entire body went stiff. You couldn’t tell him the truth. He would never expect to hear something like that come out of a nurse’s mouth. What would he say if you just straight up said, “Oh, yeah I’ve always wanted to be a soldier in the army.”

Wait… Would it really sound that bad? Now that you were thinking about it, telling him your dream might be one of the best options you have. You racked your brain for another option or a reason to lie to him, and upon finding nothing, you sighed deeply and slumped your shoulders.

“I never wanted to be a nurse.” There. That was the perfect medium. You were making him figure it out on his own whilst offering small clues instead of straight up telling him.

You watched as emotion flickered through his blue-gray irises for a mere second and waited for realization to grace his handsome features. You either missed it, or it never happened.

“You… didn’t?” He furrowed his brow and parted his lips subconsciously, which was the cutest thing, but nobody needed to know that. Except for everyone in the entire universe.

With a simple shake of your head, you stood straighter and waited for him to figure it out. He glanced at you for more than a few seconds and you lifted the gun to give him another small hint and his eyes lit up.

“Gun—Army—You wanted to be a soldier.” He said it with pure awe which confused you and maybe even startled you, but you brushed it off as nothing.

You nodded and smiled softly at his expression. It warmed your heart and you didn’t know what the other feelings in your chest were.

“I’ve never heard of a dame wanting to be a soldier. Only a little guy from Brooklyn who thought he could accomplish anything.” He smiled as a fond memory flooded his brain and you smiled.

His statement reminded you of the small man whom you saw get into fights in every alleyway. “Yeah, well. It’s always been a dream of mine. My mother always told me I couldn’t because it wasn’t ladylike.” You sighed, voice strained, and slumped your shoulders. She was probably right but a girl could dream.

“Who says you need to be ladylike?” A small smirk broke through his façade and caused you to smile and shake your head.

“Everyone, basically. It would be a living nightmare for a lot of people if they found out a woman joined the army.”

“Does it really matter what they think?”

“It does if it can get me arrested,” You countered and Bucky nodded slowly and frowned, glancing away from you for a second before shifting his gaze.

Changing subject quickly so as to avoid your discontent, he said, “Do you think you’ll ever be able to use your voice?” He watched as you slowly began making your way back into the tent and followed behind like a puppy.

“I don’t know,” You whispered practically soundlessly but he heard you. “I mean, the doctors said my vocal cords were damaged but I’m whispering which is already a big step not many mute people can take.” You released a puff of air and opened the curtain of the tent, stepping inside and holding the fabric open behind you for Bucky to follow.

“Really?” You nodded. “You’d think it’d be easy to whisper,” He said with awe and you shook your head.

“No, whispering’s a bit more complicated than most people think.”

A small frown replaced his interest and his gaze faltered. “Well, I’m proud of you for stepping past your comfort zone.” His blue-gray eyes found yours and crimson filtered through the apples of your cheeks. You desperately attempted to ignore the butterflies in your stomach as you stared into the colorful irises of the soldier before you. He was just different. In every way. His personality was special, one you’d never think you’d find. He was stubborn and acquiescent at the same time; if that was even possible. His aura was full of loving-kindness with a bit of burden but nobody’s perfect. Even his facial features were different; his eye’s shape and color, his small but masculine nose, his plump lips; he was beautiful.

What confused you the most, was how you were thinking about this now. Of all the times you could have been admiring his characteristics, you were doing it when the military base was possibly under attack, or worse, already being held hostile.

With halting realization, you gasped. “That’s it! How could I have overlooked this?”

Bucky seemed startled by your sudden outburst, but a new flake of interest covered his bewilderment. “What?”

“The military base isn’t under attack.”

The look that formed on his face was one of shock, confusion, and even terror. “What do you mean?” The lack of tonality in his voice showed that he might have already known what you meant.

“We’re not under attack because we’ve already been captured.” You paused and swallowed the thick lump of fear that molded in your throat. “We’re hostages.”