TEARS FROM THE MOON

Chapter 50

All the screaming and shouting from the fans in our immediate vicinity, suddenly descended into a strange sort of eerie, deathly silence as all eyes seemed to be on me!
It was just as if the whole world had very suddenly come to an abrupt halt and time was actually standing still in sheer disbelief at what had just happened.
I then started to hear some rather hushed, whispered voices and a few stifled giggles mixed in amongst the surprise that a complete unknown had spoken so out of turn to this much loved, very well respected movie star.

Taking in a long, deep breath, I knew that I couldn't look at the movie star in question, so I kept my head bowed.  I felt so bad about what I had just done, that I could literally have cried right there and then.
How could I have even said that to him?
How could I have been so utterly mean?  
However, I needed to get right to the bottom of all this. I needed to have it out with Amelia once and for all. Even though I knew, that standing on the red carpet at a world premier of a prestigious film event as the guest of a well renowned actor, whom I just happen to be in love with, was neither the time nor the place for a confrontation, I still had to do it.
For his sake if no one else's.
But by doing this I had quite possibly spoilt any chance I would ever have had of being with Alan now. I mean, how on earth was he bound to react after such a loud and public humiliation.
The only voice that I could now hear in my muffled and totally confused state of mind was that of the security guard stood beside me, as he now said:

"Come along, Mr. Rickman. Come this way. "

The crowds were also starting to filter off now and away from the barriers as all the celebrities, including Alan, were making their way inside the cinema's entrance.
I felt decidedly alone, although both Maya and Amelia were still standing there, looking shocked by my brutal outburst towards him.
To his credit though, Alan hadn't said a word to me, although thinking about it, I wasn't entirely sure whether or not that was a good or a bad thing.

As I now watched him being escorted inside, I really wished that I was able to just run right over to him, fling my arms around his neck and apologise profusely about the hurtful way I had just this minute spoken to him.

All of this had not been my choice though, as I would never go out to intentionally hurt or upset him. I mean, how could I? But now, standing out here on this cool, spring evening,  that was exactly what I had done! And I absolutely hated myself for resorting to such awful, unforgivable behaviour.

But what I hated even more, was the fact that two of my so called best friends had actually made me stoop to such despicable depths.  In doing so, they had allowed me to cause pain and humiliation to one of the most kindest of all men, who did not deserve to be treated in this awful manner. 
A desperate feeling of incredible nausea was now hitting me as I tried to come to terms with what I had just done. 

"That really was a bit harsh". Maya eventually spoke, her voice almost a whisper, as her words echoed my feelings.

I raised my head upwards and noticed the disappointed expression that was apparent all over the face of a friend that I trusted like no other.

"I'd say so". Amelia chimed in, "Was it really necessary to speak to him like that!".

I now glanced at Amelia, who also looked decidedly bewildered.

"I really did feel for him". Maya went on. "I mean, I remember you telling me that you hated him at one point, but I honestly thought you'd changed your mind".

Maya took in a big breath, then shaking her head in complete disgust at me, added:

"I really don't know what's got into you lately, you've changed so much Gwen. It's like you've become Satan or something ".  She went on,  "I mean, I can't understand what would ever possess you to even think about doing such a terrible thing, never mind actually carry it out!"