Sensations

Blood?

Hurriedly running down hallways, trying to reach my classroom asap, I took a second to catch my breath. But it was instantly replaced by another bout of running and chasing down hallways to not be more late than I already was.

Even though my mind was in a disunion after that dream, that f **king dream, I was still trying my hardest to keep my life together. I must be stronger than that, right?

"I'm asking you to do this"
"It's for your own good"
"listen to my voice"
" I won't ever hurt you"
"I don't want you to be alone"

I shook my head to get rid of those thoughts, those words, those eyes- UHHHHH. With the last bit of energy left in me, I took a left and made a final dash towards my classroom, beads of perspiration evident on my forehead and the thumping of my heart making me deaf ( relax I'm just trying to reach my class, not finishing an Olympic event XD), I finally stood infront of the door that will, well most probably, lead to my doom.

Okay so skipping all the unnecessary details about how I got insulted in front of the whole class for being late, and then again getting yelled at for absent mindedly staring outside the window during the lecture, I was standing in the hallway and waiting for this lesson to get over.

I went through so much just to get yelled at and then stand punished for the rest of the lesson. I should've just stayed in bed and attended one class late.*sigh*
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This room seems more familiar now as I spend almost all my school hours here.

I was again at Mrs Moto's office, like it's my second home, to probably get lectured or asked to do social service, but I couldnt keep my mind off of that dream.

That dream.

I cannot get my head about it. I mean yes I was prepared, literally anything. I was prepared to see his face, prepared to accept it even it was someone I knew, prepared for anything but that. Certainly not those-*creak*

I was brought back from my reverie as the door behind me opened with a creaking sound and I was again facing those piercing eyes of Mrs Moto. She gave me a brief glance and went back to settle the papers on her desk.

After what seemed like hours, she finally cleared her throat to talk. 'So miss Saito, as I've already told you that your behaviour is getting worse, your attention is wavering, your work is suffering, although your grades are okay you certainly are not. You clearly seem distressed, unorganized, always lost, always late!'

She took a breather, then continued,

'I don't even know what is going on with you because you won't tell me. I can see something is troubling you, but I am assuring you again that even it is personal you can tell me. You can talk to me. Talk to someone, Lisa maybe, but don't ruin everything. You're a good pupil, I don't have anything against you to keep insulting you like that. You should know that I only want your good. So if you wanna talk to me about it I'm here.'

I did not even realize that my mouth was wide open and I was staring at her like a stupid squirrel till she waved her hand at my face. I quickly regained my calm and cleared my throat before speaking,

'uh yeah! Thankyou so much ma'am. It's uh actually a little odd to see you so concerned about me but umm, thankyou. Also you're right about me stressing over something the past few days but it's nothing.' I lied.

NO ONE MUST, NO ONE SHOULD. you're not alone. NO ONE...alone....never...tell.....ughhhh

I decided to tell her.

'Ma'am there's actually something that I have been wanting to tell someone', she noded as though already aware of it.

'so yeah, the past month or so I have been having sort of uhhh dreams you could say, I've probably told you about it already but' , I say dreams as if testing my words.

'What I didn't tell you is that they're not the usual type of dreams. They actually continue like a story. But the thing is it's not that that's bothering me. It's the uhh, how do you say it, the effect of it or uhh the sensations. Because it feels so real and nostalgic. Like I know all this but at the same time I don't. Like I had a memory loss. Or like I've lived this other life of some sorts.'

Through my rant, I tried to look at her to see any hint of lack of interest or amusement in her eyes, but boy was I shocked. She looked so intensely and heard everything so attentively that I didn't feel stupid in staying that stuff. So I just continued.

'and that also if feels really real like it's not just in my dream but in my real life too. So I have been distracted because of it. I'm scared to sleep sometimes because if it, because I'm just scared what if it were real. I'm not ready for such stuff. I mean it's like I'm going mad.' I gave out a humourless laugh, to which she spoke.

'Youre not mad or overimaginative, actually you're brave enough to access what's going on is disturbing you and it's wrong. You're also really brave to tell me about it, not caring what I might say about it. But also I'm no expert in psychological things and as I've told you before you can talk to a friend of mine who is.'

I was continuously nodding and taking her words in but something else caught my attention while she was talking. The amount of stationary items on her desk. The thumb pins, the paper cutter, all-pins, compass, scissors and all sorts of stuff on her desk which was not necessarily needed. Also the way her hand brushing over them unknowingly while she talked.

Not realising it I just interrupted her, ' Sorry umm ma'am I need to ask you, why do have so much stationary stuff on your desk. It's something a preschool teacher would have. You teach the senior grade then how so?'

She looked mildly surprised by my sudden interest and gave a chuckle before answering, ' Yes you're right they're actually a preschool teacher's stuff. She's the one I'm telling you about. Her name is Miso San. She's a preschool teacher. But does take therapy sessions on weekends. Because the teachers salary is not enough you know hehe. So she leaves some of her stuff here because it's close to her school and clinic.'

I nod as though trying to take as much information in as possible. Then she goes on to say, 'So if you'd like to talk to her here's her number. And also this time I'm not telling your mother about this but if things get out of hand then I'm absolutely telling her.'

'Thank you so much ma'am. Actually I didn't want to worry my mom about it you know with everything going on in my house so I haven't told her. And please it would be great if you told no one about it. Thankyou again. I may take your leave now'.

She nods and smiles. But as I was about to turn around and walk, something caught on my foot like a strap, and the next things happened so fast I couldn't register. All I could know was I fell face first facing the door and a loud sound behind my back. Like the table flipped.

I took some seconds to regain myself and I turned back to apologize only to scream in horror.

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Blood.

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A/N

I'm back with another update after 238484736 years. But it's okay this I had college and shit and I'm sorry, because this story is tricky and it tricks my mind while I'm writing it. So yes, if anyone read it so far then thankyou sm💜

It could be great if you could star my chapters.
Till then

Take care 안녕 (◕ᴗ◕✿) !!!!!!!!