The Deal

The government are trying their best to block them off but it's not enough. I sit there, staring at my laptop, watching my security fail. Nobody will save me now. As I am accepting my death, my hero and only idol busts through my door, accompanied my millions of his own. I am filled with hope and gratefulness that is all destroyed completely when these orders come out of Barry's mouth: "Kill the president."

I'm the fucking president. I never imagined this to be the way I die but it is what it is. I was sure I was going to hell when at the last split second, Barry cancels the order with a mere 'stop'. 

"Holy shit," he says, "You never told me you had ogre porn, this shit is rare!"

"I'm Donald Trump, obviously I have ogre porn!"

"Anyway, why'd you build the wall, Trump?!"

"Why do you care? You're a bee!"

"Oh, you're right. lol." He pauses, "Give me all your ogre porn and we will never bother America again."

"Cool." I go for a handshake, being the well-known idiot I am, and accidentally kill Barry B Benson. oof. 

The bees tweet it out before confronting me. Wow, I'm so gonna die is my last thought before everything cuts to black

---

I wake up in cold sweat and thankful that it was just a dream, almost guilty I cheated on my wife with Marge Simpson. (Almost.) But out of my luxurious, white doors- like not to boast or anything but I think I'm attracted to those doors and you would be too- the devil himself came over holding a TV and placed it on the bed, right in front of me. I turned to my right but Marge Simpson was no longer laying there, instead James Charles. 

"Hey sister!" The annoying words blurt out his mouth. Shocked, I look back at the devil in fear.

He grinned wickedly and I was suddenly unable to move! The TV went on and my eyes were glued to it. Something inexplicably evil came on. THE HORROR!!! I THINK I'M IN HELL!!!! 

It looped and looped on forever.

THE END.