Billy Hargrove Angst One Shots

"Do you think I liked hurting you?"

"Are you alright?" Steve's voice filled your ears and you looked into your red plastic cup of beer.

"Hmm? Yeah, I'm fine, this is just the first party since, y'know" You replied with a shrug and he nodded, leaning forward and kissing you on your forehead, causing you to smile.

"We can leave if you want?" He suggested with a concerned look.

"No, no, it's okay." you said, composing yourself with a smile in his direction.

Steve was so sweet, he'd taken you on a few dates since your break up and you'd finally ventured out to one of Hawkin's infamous parties with him.

"I'm gonna go get a beer, will you wait here?" he asked you, standing up and you nodded.

"Of course!" you answered cheerfully, watching him walk into the house. You smiled to yourself at the prospect of being with him, he was caring, attentive and so eager to let everyone know that you were dating him, the polar opposite of your last relationship. And if summoned by your thoughts, you felt someone heave down next to you with a sigh and you looked.

"Hi." You said sharply.

"Hey." Billy replied.

Awkwardness fell over you and you looked around at the people in the garden, laughing and chugging beer and Billy fiddled with the glass bottle in his hands.

"So, you here with Harrington?" he asked with a sarcastic tone.

"I am" you confirmed with a smile and a drink of your beer, Billy grunted an acknowledgment and looked across the garden, his jawline clenching slightly.

"Are you dating him now?" He asked again, more aggressively.

"Yeah, I guess I am" you nodded and looked at him, his gaze not shifting as he continued to stare away from you.

"Talk about a downgrade" he said with a small, mean laugh and you sighed.

"Well, what was I supposed to do Billy? I'm not going to sit around for you and wait to see if you make up your mind about what you want." Finally, he turned to you, his lips pursed and his eyes narrowed.

"Do you think I liked hurting you?" he asked in a low tone and you shrugged.

"You ended it with me, Billy. You said that and I quote 'we were too young for all this bullshit' so yeah, I don't think you disliked it, plus, aren't you here with some other girl? Or no doubt will find someone to entertain you later." You snapped at him, your tone harsh and cold, he blinked a few times, taken aback at your outburst.

"Whatever." he sniped back and you rolled your eyes.

"And there he is, Billy Hargrove, doesn't give a shit about anything except himself" you stood up and brushed yourself off as he watched you, licking his lips quickly and his breath becoming shallow.

"I don- I mean, I just-" he became flustered over his words and you sighed hard.

"What Billy? If you have something to say, say it now." You demanded as you folded your arms across your body. He stood up quickly and looked at you with those blue eyes that at one point had made your heart flutter in your chest and taken away your ability to speak, but now they were full of distant desperation and confusion. Billy look panicked as if he was trying to find the words to say, but eventually, he just looked at the ground.

"I didn't think so." you said flatly, you looked over your shoulder and spotted Steve weaving through the people, carrying a beer and he stopped as his gaze fell upon you two, you smiled at him and turned back around.

"Maybe one day you'll figure out what you want, Billy, but you can't just drag people like me along into your hurricane until you do. So, I'm sorry." you patted him lightly on the shoulder in a half-assed 'there-there' motion and turned walk away, greeting Steve with a smile and a kiss on the cheek as he threw his arm around you and pulled you back into the crowd.

"I'm sorry too" Billy mumbled under his breath as he watched you walk off.

"I'm sorry" he whispered; barely audible as he grew angry at himself for not being able to say those two words to your face, to have to stand and watch you be happy while he just treaded water surrounded by beer and meaningless one night stands. He clenched his fist and threw the glass bottle at the ground with an almighty smash.

"FUCK." he called out as he palmed his face with annoyance.

"Tommy! Crack that fucking keg open already!" He yelled as he stalked away from the house, once again practicing his finely tuned skill of burying his emotions deep.