More Than Air In My Lungs

I Need Your Love

Frank stared down at the tiny plastic stick in his friend's hands, the pink tip and two lines altering his entire life with their dim glow. Although his eyes clearly seen the object and the digital screen crammed onto it, his brain couldn't connect between the stick and the expression on the other man's face. Frank forgot how to breathe the longer he gazed, and was really starting to feel the effects of suffocation.

"She's about twelve weeks along. We waited to make sure she wouldn't have a first-trimester miscarriage..." Gerard spoke up, dragging out his words in a torturously slow manner, and crushing the silence that had ascended. His black hair fell just to the end of his chin, random strands beginning to curl due to the humidity in the air, rather than plummet in a straight line like usual. The younger knew just how thick, the older's tangle of hair was. Frank had spent many nights knotting his fingers in it, all the while losing himself in the way Gerard's lashes would flutter shut while his scalp was tenderly massaged.

Frank's attention was snapped back into reality and away from nights that wounded his heart to think about when he noticed Gerard's jaw repeatedly opening and closing, as though he were desperately looking for something to say. His impure orbs shot around the wooded area but failed to find something interesting to land his eyes on. Frank could sense Gerard's growing nerves, and for a second Frank's hand twitched and he fought the gnawing urge inside him to comfort the other man. It was mere instinct that his body struggled to listen to the demands of his brain. After the extensive amount of times Frank had cradled Gerard's head against his chest and kissed away tears like they were nothing more than the whisps on a young dandelion, he didn't know how to not comfort the other. He couldn't though, no. Gerard had betrayed him. He didn't deserve to be consoled, if anything, he should be rushing to Frank's aid. Instead, Gerard stood shifting from foot to foot and glancing around the woods, his fingers tugging at the hem of his shirt and playing with a bracelet that Frank had never seen him wear before, all the while building up the agony Frank would inevitably sink into.

The pair were stood face to face in the middle of a vegetative forest. Summer was grasping at their corner of the world, threatening to push spring away until the next season. The leaves were deep shades of jade and pine, the foliage stretching and covering any piece of sky that threatened to illuminate the moss-covered forest floor. The air was still as if the animals and nature itself could sense the discomfort and agitation radiation off the two men and were anxiously waiting for the chaos to break out.

"Frank?"

The mentioned man didn't move in the slightest, subconsciously choosing to remain statue-like. His eye-line though was now glued to the jewelry dangling from Gerard's wrist and an acid-like numbness bled through his seal of emotions. Frank concluded it must've come from her because Gerard was not a jewelry person. He wouldn't have gotten it on his own. Before he gave himself permission Frank was puking the words up, his curiosity burning viciously.

"Where did the bracelet come from?" His tone was sharp and bitter, void of any warm emotion.

Gerard froze, his jaw dangling in the slightest, eyes wide. He was caught off guard for sure, and Frank felt an inkling of satisfaction at the ounce of power he had. It faded as soon as it had come through, and he watched as Gerard's brow tilted downwards and a frown etched its way on to his features.

"That's what you're concerned about? Not the fact that I got Lindsey pregnant, but because she got me a bracelet?"

Instant fury flamed up inside Frank. Gerard didn't understand the significance of something so mundane and rather petty, but to Frank, it meant so much more. The fact that Gerard kept the bracelet and was wearing it meant that he had feelings for Lindsey, and his betrayal was deeper than just an act of a lustful craze. Not that it being a lustful craze would make it any better, but if Gerard had feelings, it meant Frank was completely out of the picture. And that shattered his heart.