LENNOX ▸ RUBEN LOFTUS-CHEEK

THIRTY-SIX • COME HOME

Lennox has spent the night at Rebekah and Logan's flat and, in the morning, Ruben had left with the other Chelsea boys to play an antisemitism friendly in Boston against the New England Revolution.

I know you wanted some space but I wanted to tell you I'm about to leave for Boston, he'd texted her in the morning. I won't be back for a few days. I want to fix this. Really. I love you.

She'd liked the message, not able to come up with any words for a response. She didn't know what to say and she thanked the Apple gods in that moment for creating reactions to messages.

For the next three days, Lenny had a set routine. She'd go to ballet practice in the morning and return to her old apartment in the late afternoon/early evening to hang out with Jesse, glue their butts to the couch and watch reruns of The Inbetweeners. He enjoyed the company and she didn't want to go back home to an empty house, no Ruben. So, she surrounded herself with distractions and friends and tried not to think about it too much.

On the third night of their lazy, friend bonding date, Logan joined them after working on a Sunday and when Rebekah saw, she stepped over them and turned the TV off. "Alright. I'm sick of you lot lazying about. What is wrong with you three?"

The three friends passed around their bottle of vodka, each slightly past tipsy but not drunk. "I'm injured. I'm useless on the pitch right now," Jesse began.

"I got told off by my boss at work today," Logan grumbled, uncrossing her arms and greedily reaching for the vodka so she could take a big gulp.

"And my boyfriend doesn't care about me," Lenny shrugged, handing Logan the bottle after taking a sip herself.

"Oh, my God. You three are a sight for sore eyes. Jess, your just injured for the rest of the month. You're not useless. You'll get back to training before next season starts. Stop whining."

She turned to Logan, staying, "You are the most badass, confrontational girl I know. If you didn't do anything wrong to deserve being scolded like a child, stand up for yourself. You fucking got this."

And then was Lenny's turn. "Ruben loves you. You know that. And it wasn't fair of him to not prioritize you but it's not fair of you to give him an ultimatum. His life changed so drastically in the past few months. Get the fuck over it and call him. Tell him to come home."

None of the three expected the tough love act from Rebekah, each having their jaw dropped at the harsh words spoken out of love at them. Nevertheless, each straightened up and before she knew it, Lenny was in bed for the night, calling Ruben.

"Lenny?" His voice sounded deep, quiet, raspy. He sounded like he'd just woken up and Lenny took a moment to let her eyes flutter shut as she recalled every magical morning she got to share with the love of her life.

But then she practically smacked herself for forgetting that the two were in completely different time zones and wile it may have only been midnight in London, it was just about five am in Boston.

"Shit. We're you sleeping? Sorry. I can call back later," she apologized.

"No," he said softly. Lenny could hear him stretch as he yawned. "Don't worry. Is everything okay, baby?"

Her heart skipped a beat at his loving nickname for her. She hadn't heard him call her baby in at almost a week and she didn't realize how much it meant to her until now.

"Yeah, everything's okay. I—I just..." for some reason, the words got caught in her throat. She wanted to tell him she missed him. She wanted to tell him she was sorry.

But, she didn't even have to say it.

"I know," he said to her. "Me, too."

It was quiet for a moment, the silence thick between them.

Finally, Lenny said something.

"Logan and I watched Thrones tonight."

Even though they both had watched Game of Thrones before individually, Ruben and Lennox had spent their entire Christmas break rewatching the series together in preparation for the last season. It was a shame, seeing as they hadn't gotten to watch the new season together.

"Cal and I watched it, too." Another thick silence enveloped them. "Did you have ballet practice today?"

"Yeah. We started Swan Lake," she told him. It was unnecessary information Ruben needed to know; he probably didn't even know what Swan Lake was. Lennox was practically beating herself up over screwing up their conversation.

Instead, he surprised her. "I know. I saw pictures on the Royal Opera House's Instagram after training last night."

"Oh, fuck," Lennox cursed. "You play the friendly today! And I'm waking you up at 5 am to talk about Swan Lake..."

"Lenny, it's ok. I have to be up in a bit anyway. I'm glad you called."

"Me, too."

"Listen, baby, I want to—" He was cut off by a knock at his door just before Lennox heard one of Chelsea's managers doing the rounds for wake-up calls. She could hear Ruben sigh before he spoke again. "I have to go."

"Yeah. Um... have a good game. I'll talk to you when you get back home, okay?"

"Yeah. Sounds good..."

"Come home," Lennox suddenly blurted out, unable to hold it in any longer. She missed him. "Soon."

She could hear the smile on his face as he spoke. "I will. Bye, baby."

"Bye."

The conversation felt more tense with them being in two different continents than it had when they were in the same room.

Lennox groaned loudly, hating how awkward she seemed over the phone, like she was walking on eggshells. She didn't sound like herself at all. It was alarming, to say the least.

Nevertheless, she promised herself she would be more composed and less tense when she saw him in person the next day.