a girl like you - trixya

10.

(Song of the chapter: None of Dem- Robyn)

Saturday I was stood in front of my mirror, dressed and ready for tonight. I had chosen a black mini dress that hugged tight around my body. My hair was curled, and my makeup was perfect. I decided to add my pink trainers so as to stay true to my pink aesthetic. As my phone dinged, I looked down, seeing it was a message from Chris. It was a photo of him smiling captioned 'can't wait for tonight b'. I smiled slightly, we had been talking since our interaction on Friday and he seemed like a genuinely nice guy. I wasn't completely sure what would happen tonight, but I couldn't help but wonder with an excited anticipation.

I arrived at Adore's at roughly 9, half an hour after the start. Adore crushed me in a welcoming hug, her face beaming and her eyes wide. I couldn't help but smile and squeeze her back; that girl's joy was honestly infectious. Her flat was dimly lit with neon lightbulbs causing the apartment to feel more like a club than a home. Adore lived alone, which was unusual for someone who was still attending high school, but she had fallen out with her mother and had a large following online meaning she could finance her own place, and it worked best for her. The flat was already pretty full, but the dimness made it difficult to pick out individual faces. Squinting slightly I looked around for other faces I knew. Over in one corner I spotted Chris and I slowly made my way over to him.

As I reached the sofa, he was sat on he looked up and smiled, patting next to him, inviting me to sit. I did and he pulled me into a brief yet tender hug. I could smell his cologne, earthy, and I could also faintly smell the scent of cigarettes. "You look... amazing" he blurted whilst looking at me up and down. Smiling I replied, "you don't look too bad either." He was clad in a black band t-shirt and skinny jeans with his messy hair slightly more styled. "I've been looking forward to this" he admitted, leaning in closer to me so I could hear him. I nodded, "me too". "Your friend Adore is crazy" he whispered, I immediately burst out laughing. Once my giggling subsided, I looked at him and raised one eyebrow "you can say that again" to which Chris now laughed and moved his hand onto one of my thigh. I squirmed slightly at the touch at first but didn't remove the hand, slowly becoming accustomed to it.

Suddenly, I felt something plop down next to me, and turning my head I saw the familiar blonde head. "Hello lovebirds" Katya smirked. I blushed and Chris reached over, offering his hand to shake to Katya, "I'm Chris", "I'm Katya" she replied. "This is a cool party" Katya stated, Chris nodded "it's a cool group of people, like Max, he's cool" Chris gestured to Max, a gay guy in my year who had a pink feather boa and plastic tiara on and was dancing with an admirable reckless abandon. "I love gay people, they're so funny" Chris laughed to which Katya frowned, "that's a ridiculously superficial overgeneralisation, you can't attribute one set of qualities to one set of people. That's absurd." My head pricked up and I looked at Katya with silent appreciation. Chris stammered, "but I'm being nice, surely attributing a positive quality is a good thing." Katya shrugged, "yeah, but it's still a generalisation." Turning to smile at me she stood up and walked off back into the crowd. "Come on" said Chris, shrugging off the interaction, taking my hand and leading me to the dance floor.

The music pulsed and I held onto Chris' shoulders and he held onto my waist. I swung my hips like I had with Katya and he pulled me closer and closer to him. By the time that our bodies were touching I looked up at him and I could see his brown eyes looking back at mine. He reached up, holding the side of my face and pulling me into him until our lips touch. They brush gently, and I feel him smile. The next time our lips meet it's with more force, working together until I feel his tongue swipe my bottom lip, I grant him access and pull him closer, weaving my hands into his curly hair, tugging slightly, to which I feel him inhale sharply. His hands run up and down my sides eventually stopping on my hips and squeezing as we pull out of the kiss. I smile up at him and he winks. Looking behind him I can see a bright blonde directly behind bobbing up and down to the music and my eyes are automatically drawn. Katya is dancing with a boy who looks much older, he's tall and broad and as I watch I see Katya pull him in by his shirt and they clash lips. They spin slightly as they dance, until Katya is facing me. As she pulls away from the kiss, I see her eyes flick to mine for a brief second, but it's enough to make me pull Chris back down and start kissing him again, to which Katya mirrors my actions. Whilst kissing Chris I glance up and over and I see Katya looking dead at me whilst still locking lips with the guy. She sustains eye contact and it soon has almost become a game of chicken between the two of us; both staring across at each other mid make out and neither of us willing to admit defeat first. As she slips her tongue into his mouth, I can see an evil smirk form across her face. My stomach instantly knots, and I pull away from Chris, telling him that I'm leaving as I feel ill, but I'll text him later.

I leave feeling breathless and confused. Raising my hands I feel my swollen lips which now feel almost sinful I silently curse at myself for acting so immature. The moon shone bright above and looking up at it I could feel it shining down on me, almost mocking me; it could shine so bright and unaffected, yet I crumbled from one glance at a party. I hated how I was acting, and I hated how I couldn't decipher what I was feeling, and it was all Katya's fault.