Childhood friends

Disappointing

"Tao!"
"Tao! Open up!" The constant yells and hard knocking continued, how long was he gonna stay like that? Was he never gonna go home? Tao opened his eyes. He was still yelling "Tao! Tao! Tao!" And knocking on his door. He looked at the ceiling and glanced around in the room. 

It was foreign but familiar. It was grey in the room as if the sun shone darkness instead of light and if all color was gone. 

"Tao! Open up!" 

He got out of bed. Was he taller than before? Was he sick? His head's spinning and he's swaying like a tree in the wind. Everything seemed to be in some trance, it didn't feel real. But it is, isn't it? He opened his bedroom door and looked into an unfamiliar apartment. 

He glanced around, no lights were on. The grey color engulfed the apartment and probably the rest of the world. He turned his head to the right, the door was shaking because of all the knocking, and the sound was deafening "Tao! Open up! Please open up!" Slowly Tao made his way to the door. But what would happen if he opened it? He was about to grab the handle as the thought struck him. 

Who's outside? The voice reminded him of someone he knows. A voice he has listened to for years. He opened the door and on the other side, he stood. "Tao!" He embraced Tao "Are you alright? I've been so worried"
"Kr-Kris?" Tao was shocked at his own voice, it sounded a bit deeper than usual. He must be sick. The man loosened his grip "Yeah?" Was he Kris? He's taller than Kris and even more handsome. His hair was grayish blonde. He was also taller than Tao, but he resembled Kris, those eyes. Tao can recognize them anywhere. Tao cried he didn't know why it just started. Was it because Kris was worried? What's even happening? 

Suddenly he was looking at his ceiling again. Tears streaming out of his eyes. A dream? Was it a dream? He sat up in his bed and saw that he was back in his own room. What kind of dream was that? Was it them as older? A sign? What kind of dream makes people cry in their sleep? He sat in his bed for half an hour before remembering what was going on. He was at home waiting to hang out with Kris later. He picked up his phone and called someone 

"Hey Tao! What's up?"
"I can't hang out later, I don't feel well"
"Oh, okay, should I come later? Do you need anything"
"No" Tao answered and ended the call. He stared blankly into the air.

After that he didn't really talk to Kris the next few days, he was thinking about the dream. He didn't know why but it scared him. It seemed so real, are they gonna end up like that? 

Kris was beginning to get worried about Tao because he was so quiet, he knew that. But he won't tell Kris about the dream. He focused too much on training too. His father yelled at him for skipping school, and some gossip magazine had written an article about it, but honestly, Tao couldn't care less. His father would understand that he isn't who he thinks he is sooner or later.

"Tao" He looked up from the ground and looked at Kris walking beside him "What?" Tao could see the worried look on his face clearly and continued to look down on the ground "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine, why?"
"You've been distant since last week, and you haven't been eating well either"
"I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm just a bit stressed" he said with a smile, but his eyes still broke the facade.

They continued their walk home and sat down on the swings near their homes "So.. 3 weeks?" Kris asked and looked at Tao who nodded with a sigh "I wish I didn't grow older. I don't want to participate" His 17th birthday was coming up, and Tao really didn't want to go to the company, he didn't want to participate.
"So no party?" Kris asked 
"Maybe I'll hold something for our group of friends, but I'm not sure, not a fan of birthdays"
"I'll still give you a present" They both chuckled a bit "Your decision"
"Kris, what am I gonna do? I can't live this way" He said, and Kris looked at him who looked as he could fall down from the swing at any time "I don't know"

The next week Kris got a girlfriend, and Tao had no energy, he didn't have the energy to be jealous or mad. He just sat quietly and listened to them talk. He didn't even care if they kissed, he didn't care about anything, something that worried him. He's giving up. 

His birthday a few weeks later wasn't much better. He got presents, but they didn't cheer him up, even if it was the newest Gucci, and even if he had wanted them for so long, and talked so much about them. His parents didn't really say anything about it though, and his father showed him off to everyone, and he really didn't enjoy it. 

To know so many people have expectations of him was nerve-wracking, but the day after a surprise awaited him though. Tao sat and talked with Johnny about this and that, in their class, still ignoring Kris, of course, when someone spoke

"Tao" in a small voice and both guys turned to look at the person. A girl from their neighboring class stood before them, with a nervous expression "Yeah?" Tao asked "Can I.. talk to you in private?" she asked, and Tao glanced at Johnny, who sat with a smug look on his face "Sure" Tao answered and followed her. While they walked down the corridor, it hit him, who the fuck is she?! She's gonna confess that's for sure, and Tao felt the urge to scoff itch inside him. Not only does he not know who it is, he's also rejecting her. Poor girl. They arrived at the roof, and Tao couldn't help but think, of course, it's on the rooftop! "Tao, I really like you, more than a friend, and I know you don't know who I am and if you can't accept my feelings because of that, then let's start out as friends" God what an innocent confession. Tao would accept it, if he wasn't gay. But he knows it'll hurt her more to be with him, than him rejecting her now. She was really cute, no doubt. Her hair was black and short, her eyes were big and her lips were like a cat's. He stood for a moment and analyzed her. She didn't look that nervous, more confident actually "I'm sorry" he started out and noticed the change in her expression "I can't accept your feelings and even if we start out as friends, that's all there'll be to it" She nodded at his words "If it had been different, I would have accepted your feelings right away. But I'm sorry, I can't. But maybe later we can become friends" He said and left the roof. 

"Yoooo" a voice sounded and an arm slung over his shoulders when he came down "So did she cry?" Johnny asked, and Tao shook his head "No, she took it really well. Actually, I'm a bit worried you know" He said and looked at Johnny "Maybe she took it well because she's used to it you know?" Johnny shrugged "Maybe"

"Anyway, I told her we might be able to be friends later" He spoke, and Johnny looked at him with his eyebrows furrowed "You did?" Tao shrug "Yeah why not" 

"Are you feeling better though?" Johnny asked as they neared their classroom. Tao turned to him and stopped walking "What do you mean?" he asked, and Johnny's eyes darted around before he answered "I mean, you've been distant lately, and you haven't smiled for a while"
"I don't know Johnny. I think I'm gonna be okay soon"
"Okay. Wanna hang out today?"
"I can't, it's the first meeting at the company"
"Aww. Fighting Tao!" He laughed at Johnny "Thanks. I'm gonna need it" he said, and the two stepped into the classroom together.

Tao and Kris walked home from the same day, and Kris was glad that Tao was smiling again "So I heard a girl from my class confessed to you" Tao looked at Kris "She was from your class?!" Tao asked, and Kris started laughing, and god Tao had missed seeing him laugh "You didn't know?" he asked, with a goofy grin on his face, and a glint in his eyes
"I don't know who the hell she was"
"Well I also heard that you rejected her"
"Yep" Tao looked at the sky, it was sunny "Why?"
"Why do you accept every girl that confesses to you?" Tao asked in response
"Because they love me, I can't just reject them"
"That why I rejected her because even if she loves me, I can't give them the love she deserve. It'll just hurt her in the end" Kris looked deep in thought for a moment "Makes sense I guess" 

They walked to the playground in their neighborhood and sat on the same swings, they sat on weeks ago. 

"So you going to the company today?"
"Yep"
"Well then I guess I should give you your present" Kris said and dug through his bag. Tao looked at him, and watched as he took out a black wrapped gift "Here, happy birthday Tao, now we're both 17" he said with a smile as he handed it to Tao "Thanks" he opened it, and inside there was a framed picture of the two, a picture from the last soccer match, where Kris had lifted him, after they had won. 

It made his beat fast and a warm feeling spread throughout his body. Beneath it was an album. The newest album from Seventeen "Omg Kris! Thanks" he jumped up from his swing and hugged Kris so tight. "I'm happy you like it" They parted ways and Tao got ready to go to the company.