Don't Make Me Love You

Chapter 28

I wasn't sure if I would be able to find Brandon, but I decided his house would be the last place I would look. His parents' demeaning nature towards him and his sexuality wouldn't help his self-esteem after what I had said and done. I considered checking Bobby's place, but somehow I doubted Brandon would want to be around Bobby or Jake. He probably wanted to be somewhere alone and secluded; probably a quiet, familiar place. My guess was right when I walked to the diner where we had eaten dinner together. As I got close, I could see him sitting in the window, head drooped forward over a plate of untouched fries. He didn't noticed me. Taking a deep breath, I entered the diner.

My presence went unnoticed as I walked towards the booth where Brandon sat. When I reached his side, I could see that he was depressingly doodling on a napkin. Unsure what else to do, I crossed my arms. "Not hungry?" I asked.

Brandon sighed, slowly lifting his head. "Not really. It's been a-" Upon seeing who he was actually talking to, Brandon froze. He straightened quickly, the napkin in his hands crumpling in his tense fist. "Max."

Wordlessly, I took a seat across from him. His cheek had a large bruise forming where I had socked him before, making him look like he'd been in a fistfight. His eyes were swollen and red like he'd been crying or something, and he'd chewed his lips to shreds. Overall, his appearance was a mess that weighed heavily on my shoulders. After stealing a fry from his plate to avoid looking as nervous as Brandon, I cleared my throat. "I want to know why you lied to me," I said with as much confidence as I could muster. "I don't want to hear anything about Jake or about Bobby. I want to know about you."

Brandon shifted uncomfortably, refusing to meet my eyes. "I don't know where to start..." he said.

"Start with the answer to my question," I suggested.

Brandon blinked at me. Then he sighed, his nervousness practically seeping out his ears. "I made a lot of mistakes when I met you. I thought you were interested in being friends, and you probably were, but I pushed you away as hard as I could. I wanted a fresh start after everything that had happened in my home town, so I thought that keeping everyone at arm's length would be smarter this time; safer. But I watched you and I thought that maybe you weren't so bad. You ad Bobby seemed so happy to be friends, and Jake too, even though you guys didn't always get along. I wanted that too, but," Brandon sank into his arms, devastated, "I had already messed it all up. You wouldn't talk to me, let alone be friends with me, and I didn't know what to do."

"So, you chose to lie to me," I accused.

The boy before me sulked. "I'm not proud of that choice. I've never been proud of it. All I wanted was to start over, and I couldn't. I tried to talk to you, to make amends, but you wouldn't even look at me. You wanted nothing to do with me..." he said. He dropped his eyes. "But you're right. I shouldn't have lied to you, and if I could take it back, I would. I would never have lied to you, even if it meant living my life without you."

I pursed my lips and looked away as butterflies fluttered in my stomach, too please with his answer. He seemed truly remorseful for what he had done. I hadn't expected to feel like forgiving him. Then again, I hadn't expected to fall in love with him either, but close proximity to Brandon was just full of surprises.

I was still mulling over what he had said when Brandon pushed the plate of fries out of the way and reached out to take my hand. I resisted, unsure of his intentions, before I let him have it. After receiving a warning look from me, Brandon held my hand firmly. "But you know what I won't take back?" he asked.

"What?" I asked, wary of his response.

"Falling in love with you, and making you love me back," Brandon said.