Bête noire → Peaky Blinders [Tommy Shelby] [ BOOK 1 ]

Thirty five.

Chapter thirty five: Hangman's knot

The knife sat precariously on her skin, soft enough to not pierce her neck, hard enough to enforce the intended message. The harsh metal should have been cold and raw against her bare skin, but her numb body could not feel anything except for the excruciating pain of his betrayal. Her throat and heart held in a silver grasp, and all she could do was stare lifelessly at the blue eyes that held the blade and a terrifying coldness she had never seen before. Caroline had always thought his eyes were golden, but looking at them now she could see no trace of the vibrancy they once held, no trace of the man I once knew.

Trembling, she tipped her chin up into the sharpened edge, tempting him to end her anguish, half hoping he would. A small stream of blood trickled from the feeble cut she could not feel, he did not flinch or remove his eyes from hers, a cruel smile stretched out across gaunt features. Caroline's frozen heart shifted at the sight of his merciless gaze, her legs almost failing beneath her. His steadfast grip on the polished weapon shifted, causing more crimson liquid to flow from the raw wound he had inflicted.

"You have to believe me, Caroline." Thomas's pleas fell empty to her ears. "There is nothing going on between May Carleton and I. We are strictly business partners and betraying your trust is not an option."

A cigarette hanging between her lips, it was best for her to pretend to be content, dangerously cool. "That's like telling me that the engagement ring on my finger is a symbol of your eternal fidelity."

"It is." He replied and attempted to grasp her hand, which she removed from his hold and with a sigh, he leaned against her doorway with a frown. "You know I love you, but you know how I get my own way."

"By sleeping with women?"

"By playing with their emotions." He replied as though it was a justified answer. "She's a widow, desperate for attention."

Caroline glared. "She's a horse trainer. What could you possibly want from her?"

"She is rich and successful, just like her father who has ties to people I can expand business with." 

"For someone who supposedly believes in equal rights for women,  you are not handling them the way you do with men." Caroline spat venomously. "I do not believe you, Thomas. You are lying to me straight through your teeth, so you know what?-"

Thomas shook his head, knowing the words before they left her mouth. "Please-don't-I'll stop, I'll do anything just-just don't-"

Caroline slid the ring off her finger and slipped it into his coat pocket. "Until further notice, this engagement has been called off. I will never willingly allow myself to be second place to any woman. I deserve a whole lot more than this and you know it, whether you're being truthful or not. Business and personal don't mix anymore. We cannot stay together."

"Fuck sake!" Thomas roared and with his fist balled, he collided it with the front door. "Why can't you just trust me on this one thing? I'd never do something like that to you. You know how much I love you, hell, everyone knows! You have to believe me!"

Caroline pursed her lips. "You have done this to one too many women and I cannot stand by it. Yes, I may have done it with men in my prime, but when I am with you, it is only you and I against the world. I am loyal like a soldier and as sweet as candy. You, on the other hand, only look out for number one, and number one is yourself."

No woman nor man dared to speak back to Thomas in such a manner, and perhaps that's why he loved her so much, because she trekked so bravely on grounds undiscovered. Truth be told, he shared a kiss with May on one of the days that Caroline had been gone. He'd met her at the races and his attention was drawn to her as she attempted to outbid him on a horse.