I went haywire as a teenager.
Depression lead me crawling through my days. I tell you this Mom not to make you sad but to let you know how much of an impact losing you had on my young life.
I did many things I shouldn’t have. I gave up many things you had loved right alongside me, but somehow with you gone they just didn’t matter anymore.
The joy of them was stripped from me. I became empty.
I searched for many things to fill myself up. Many were bad things, but some were good. I had good friends who helped and distracted me.
I had the rest of my family too who gave me love. I had pets and cats to console me and give me company. Pets you had loved too. The cats looked for you, I saw them searching, but they could never find you. I understood their sadness and confusion.
I could never forget you. A part of me is still lost and I’m wondering if I will ever get it back. Maybe that piece is in heaven with you and someday you can put it back in me and I will be whole again.
One day not long after you died I found a card cradled in the grass of our backyard. The card had a picture of Jesus on the front.
It looked like an old card. I wondered who put it there. Did it fall from heaven and you dropped it for me to find? Had someone put it in a balloon from far away and that balloon popped over my house leaving the card to fall? Did God put it there? Did a neighbor nestle it into our grass to give me comfort? I still have the card. The words on the card were Psalm 23.
It was about comfort and the valley of death. I had to wonder if it was a sign from you that you were in heaven. It made me cry hard.
Sharply splintered tears had ripped streaks from my eyes down to my toes leaving me memories of that moment as scars.
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SECRET #365
Random* Every secret is a treasure * * Every person is a treasure chest* * Hiding from your own darkness unless you open tbe treasure chest to see the glow * share your secret with us , its totally safe , your secret will be edited and posted in this b...
