Jewels of the Crown

♛ 5 ♛

I sit at the dining table, the next morning, waiting for breakfast to be brought in. Servants line the edges of the room, waiting for commands. I rest my head on a hand, as my elbow rests on the table. I try and stifle a yawn as I hear the doors open, and I look over, expecting to find kitchen maids walking in, but am surprised when I find my mother walking frailly in, quickly followed by a nurse.

"Sit up," my mother commands when she sees me. I rise quickly onto my feet as the servants around the room all bow or curtsey.

"Mother, what are you doing out of bed?"

"I said I would be up and about in no time, now stop worrying," she says as she takes a seat opposite me. When I return to my seat, my back is ram-rod straight. I daintily place my hands in my lap, crossing my ankles under the table, even though my mother won't be able to see. She has a knack for sensing these things. The room is silent as we wait for the food to arrive, and when it does, my stomach growls at the smell and sight of it. I didn't eat a lot last night, well not as much as I usually do, so I have woken up hungrier than usual. They come around the table, offering us oats, fruit, and bread. I accept them all, and my mother notices.

"Hungry?" she asks. "I heard of you not coming down to dinner last night," she says, her gaze meeting mine.

"I felt like having my dinner in my room last night. I'm alright," I respond as I wait for my mother to take her food. She nods, acknowledging me, waving off the maids around her.

"Mother," I say to get her attention as I start to eat my breakfast. A part of me notices the notable difference between this and my last meal. "Does the doctor know of you leaving your bed?"

"Adellia, would you like anything more?" she asks, seeming to be ignoring my question.

"No, thank you," I mumble.

"I'm sorry, I didn't hear you," she says, getting me to speak up more for reminding me of what I've been taught, not so she can hear me. I repeat it, which earns me a satisfied smile from my mother.

"OK, then you're all dismissed," she says looking to the servants lining the walls. They curtsey/bow once more before filing out of the room, leaving my mother, her nurse, and me.

"Mother, does he?" I insist.

"Adellia, you know I don't want everyone to know. I was not going to talk to you about this in the presence of the servants. And, no, he doesn't, but as you can see I'm in good hands. I don't need a doctor to tell me when I am fit and not to leave the bed. I am the best judge of that," she says, her stubborn, and queenly side, showing through again. I want to feel happy that maybe she's not as ill as I, and they, had thought, but I know better. She's only putting a brave face on, so I don't worry. The timing isn't coincidental either. She chose today to try and leave her bed to come down to breakfast to try and put my mind at rest, and make me think that yesterday's news isn't as bad as it is. I know she will be trying to prove to me she's not as bad as it seems until the day that she does die, or in a miracle get better. I fear, however, that by doing so she will run herself ragged, making her illness worse. My mother begins to eat her food, and I follow suit, waiting for her to break the silence.

She does eventually, carrying on the conversation. "I'm feeling a lot better today in fact," she says, driving home my fears.

"Well, take it easy, please," I plead with her, knowing that if she does, in fact, feel better, she will be acting as if there is nothing wrong with her, and go about her duties as normal.

Soon enough I have to push my breakfast away. I don't know whether if it's because I took too much, or because the worry and guilt both are still eating at me from the inside.