Redemption

Chapter 6

Josh was what you called him, he was a beautiful child. Does every sin look so beautiful, yes temptation that beautiful temptation, produce such beautiful sin. He was always smiling, such a loveable child they would say, he would always greet me with that smile every morning, but it was just hard, so hard to smile back are talk to him, when it was so painful to do. I did not mistreat him, even when knowing he was not my child but I could never give him the love of a mother are love him.

"Ah" Seth do you know when your away he would come and talk to me but I would always look quietly as he talk, yes he was a loveable child but I could never love him like how you want me to. Seth do you know I sometime wonder if my Jamie was here would he be as loveable as your josh. Sometime I wonder if it was something I did, that caused you to distant yourself from me. Was my love overbearing ?, was me loving you something I shouldn't do, Seth I don't understand your love, Why is it always so painful?, Seth is this the type of love you want to give me?, Seth can you love me more gentler, please just a little gentler because I feel if this painful love of yours continue I might brake, do you want me to brake Seth?, will this be enough for you to see how much I love you.

Seth do you love her like you love me? is your love gentle are painful when your with her?, Seth did you promise her forever like you promised me. Seth you come home a lot now is it because he's here?. Seth look at me, just look at me just for a little bit, Seth you know I take care of him, while your at work, Seth where's my loving Seth why do you not talk to me anymore.

Seth do you not want my love?, Seth I accepted your love so why can't you accept mine. Seth your love is painful, but my love for you have always been gentle, Seth do you want a painful love?, Seth I cant give you such love, I cant bear to hurt you, so just let me love you like how I normally love you, even if you can't accept it.