Here a warning: In this chapter you can find self-harm.
Joe's POV
I have to get out of here. I turned around and ran. I slammed the door behind me and ran like I never did before. I cried. I cried until there weren't any tears left. I didn't even know where I wanna go, but as I stopped I stood in front of Rami's house. That's around six kilometers away from my place. Wow. I never ran so long. I hope Rami is home. I rang at the door and two minutes later the door opened. Thank God. I felt straight in Rami's arms and cried. Rami was obviously overwhelmed but he immediately tried to comfort me. He kicked the door to close it and we walked, without stop hugging, to the living room. We sat down and Rami slowly left my hug to ask what happened, but I just wasn't able to talk. It seemed like Rami understood me and just hugged me. We sat like this for a long time and it really helped. As I was able to talk I whispered with a tearly voice :"It's Ben. And Ann." Rami waited until I continued and so I said :"They kissed." Rami seemed a bit confused and asked :"Ann and Ben? Are you serious?" I just nodded and started crying again. Rami just pressed me to his chest and let my cry all my pain out. After there were no tears left I probably fell asleep, I can't remember, but as I woke up I layed, covered with a blanket, at Rami's couch. I felt comfortable and happy, but then everything just came back to my mind. Ann and Ben. I have to puke. I ran to the bathroom and spit three or four times. And then I broke down in tears. So I sat a while, in the middle of the bathroom, crying like a child. I stood up and searched for anything sharp and found a razor blade. I swor to never do it again, but I don't care right now. I rolled shakily my sleeve up and as the cold metal touched my warm arm, blood began to floss out of it. And then Rami came in.
*meanwhile*
Ben's POV
"OK WHAT SHOULD THAT BE?" I stood up to ran after Joe, but as I came out of the house I couldn't see Joe. I put my shoes on and searched everywhere. After I couldn't find him, I went to my place, grabbed my phone and sat in my car. First I called Joe. "Hey, here's the mailbox from Joe Mazzello. Leave me a message after the sound." "Hey Joe, it's me, Ben. Listen. I am sorry. This wasn't right and I know that. If you ever listen to this then please call me back. I know that I have done shit but please, you have to forgive me." I didn't even realized that I cried while talking, but I have to find him now. I'm gonna call Gwil. "Hello, here is Gwylim, who's there?" "Hey Gwil it's me, Ben. Have you seen Joe? I have to find him as fast as possible." "Why? What happened?" "Have you seen him or not?" "No, but tell me what happened." "Ok. So, we watched a movie," "Who is we?" "Ann, Joe and me. Well, we watched like I said Avengers and everything was great. Then Joe went to go get snacks and meanwhile Ann kissed me. I tried to push her away but she is strong y'know. And then Joe walked in, saw us and ran away. I tried to get after him but as I came out I couldn't see him anymore. I already tried to call him but either he forgot his phone or he don't want to talk to me, and I understand this, but please you have to help me find him." " She kissed you and you didn't pull away?" " I tried ok?" "And she was so strong? I don't really believe you Ben. I mean look at you. You're the strongest of all of us. I can't believe you did that." "I really tried, you have to believe me!" "Then at least tell us the truth. But even then you are a bad person. You can't do that to Joe. He trusted you." "What? Gwil?" he hung up. Wow. Now I couldn't stop the tears. He's right. I am a horrible person. I don't deserve Joe. I don't deserve anybody. I sat in my car and cried for a while. Then I went in my house and layed in my bed. I don't know how I long layed there crying but I eventually fell asleep, but I can't remember when. As I woke up, I looked at my phone. No new messages. So Joe really don't wanna talk to me. I can't handle this. I have to do something.
