Her Royal Charming

Chapter Twenty Seven

*Warning triggers ahead*

Chapter Twenty Seven

I couldn't stand the looks I was getting in the halls and in class. I desperately hid myself in the shadows all throughout high school only to be thrust into the spotlight in the worst possible way.

The scene in the cafeteria seemed to go on forever. It kept replaying in my head, and the look of Derric's betrayed face haunted me every time I closed my eyes.

I left a period later completely unable to focus on anything. There was no point in being in school, it was the least of my worries.

I snuck my way out and was lost in my thoughts the whole way to my way. I don't remember opening the car and starting the ignition, but somehow it happened. My hand hovered over the steering wheel unwavering.

I was unsure how long I was frozen in the 10-2 position.

My mind was blank and my emotions piling up. Water droplets fell on the steering wheel, slowly but steadily. It took me a moment to figure out it wasn't water afterall, it was tears.

I was crying. There were plenty of reasons for me to cry, too many to name, but nothing should have triggered such a strong reaction. I was focusing on a bird in a tree a few yards away aimlessly.

I pulled out of my parking spot still crying with no concrete reason. By the time I left the school I was sniffling, and two blocks later I was sobbing so hard I had to pull over because my tears obstructed my view.

My hands covered my face as I wailed. It was the kind of ugly cry you never see in movies. The tears wouldn't stop falling, in place of one was five more ready to take its place. My tears were a never ending hydra and a monster of my own making.

The sounds of my sobbing were the only sounds in the car making me consciously aware of the fact I was utterly alone.

I pushed everyone away that seemed to care about me. Derric will never look at me the same and I've forced Edmon out with my own stupidity.

I've burnt all my bridges, there is no one left and it was all my fault. I've made my bed and now I have to lie in it alone.

Normally when my step-sister would pull a big stunt Edmon would always be there to comfort me whether it was a call, text or a warm hug. Now I was by myself with no one there to comfort me or help me calm down.

This isn't what I wanted.

This wasn't how things were supposed to be.

I was supposed to coast by senior year by keeping to the shadows. I was supposed to tell Derric who I was and finally open up to someone I cared about. I was supposed to deal with things, and now everything's tumbling down and I'm in the direct line of fire.

The stressors of my life were like falling down one by one, each feeling like a ton of bricks. My chest began tightening, and my breathing more shallow. I gripped the side of the seat, the panic building up.

I wasn't getting enough oxygen to my brain. I felt like I was going to pass out, and the worst part was that no one would come looking for me. I could die in this car and no one would know, or care. I would just be another nameless gravestone.

Suddenly the walls of the car felt too constricting. Everything was too much to handle and I couldn't keep up. My heart was pounding, my breathing erratic and my hands shaking.

I started to feel lightheaded. My throat was scratchy from all my crying and sobs. Black spots lined my vision. This was actually happening. The thought of passing out was becoming reality which scared me shitless.