Scary Love | Bucky Barnes - [COMPLETED]

14 - A Reason

Steve Rogers stepped out of the car to the curb next to a well-mended lawn. The sun was shining rather brightly and he pushed his sunglasses up his nose to cover his eyes better. Sam had also stepped out from the driver's side and stood beside The Cap, hands on his waist.

"We're not gonna run away like last time, aren't we?"

"Not this time." Steve flashed a smile to Sam and started walking towards the door; Sam following behind him, feeling rather hesitant.

The moment he stepped on the porch, a woman's voice suddenly spoke. "Please state your name and business."

Steve frowned; he was about to reach the doorbell, but he realized that the doorbell was no longer there. He looked around and scratched his head, even though it wasn't itching. He had no choice but to answer, "Steve Rogers. I'm here to see Lily?"

"Welcome, Mr. Rogers," said the monotone voice.

The door swung open, revealing Lily, who was standing there the whole time. She was grinning.

"What do you think? I've been thinking about your safehouse thing, so I tried to add this feature to Medusa. It still needs a lot of adjustments, though."

Steve chuckled lightly; he didn't think she'd take what he said this seriously. "It's... pretty cool. You remind me of one of my friends." He remembered Tony's face every time he develops something cool.

"Oh?" Lily smiled brightly. She turned to look at Sam, who was standing there awkwardly. "You brought a friend?"

"Yeah. Lily, this is Sam Wilson. Sam, Lily Walsh." He introduced them and the two shook hands.

"Nice to finally meet you. Bucky's got a good taste, huh Cap?" Sam threw a sly glance at Steve, one eyebrow raised.

"What? You know Bucky?" Lily stuttered, feeling warmth creeping on her cheeks.

"Yeah, he's an alright man. Too serious, though." He smirked. "Nice—uh—home security. Even Cap didn't stand a chance in penetrating it."

"What?" The girl asked, immediately staring at The Cap.

"Nothing," Steve quickly answered. "Can we go in?"

"Of course," Lily—who was still confused—stepped aside to let the men in. Steve frowned as he glared sharply at Sam, who was only grinning innocently.

As they both sat on the living room in front of the TV that had been muted, Lily offered to fetch them something to drink. "A cup of coffee is fine," Steve smiled politely.

"Do you have anything stronger? Hennessy, maybe?" Sam asked, and as he was joking, he didn't expect the girl to respond so seriously.

"Coming right away," the girl went to get the drinks, and Sam's eyes widened in surprised as he jolted up and chased her.

"Wait, wait, I was joking!"

A few minutes later, they have all gathered on the living room with three cups of coffee in front of them. Steve decided to open the conversation.

"I'm sorry for not coming over as often as I should," he spoke softly.

Lily raised her head to look at Steve and smiled weakly. "It's fine, really," said she. "How is he?"

"He's doing well, they say. I don't even get to meet him much, since he spends almost all of his time in the cryo chamber."

"I see," Lily replied, already running out of words. They were busy with their own thoughts for a while. The only sound heard was Sam slurping his hot coffee.

"I've got something to show you," Steve reached into the inner pocket of his brown leather jacket and took out a small notebook. It looked old and the black leather cover was tattered on the corners, meaning that it was used very often—it was one of the notebooks she bought him. The blonde man handed the notebook to the girl, who then held it very carefully as if it was some fragile thing. "When he escaped his hideout in Bucharest, Bucky only brought a backpack with a few things inside of it. This was one of them."

Lily opened the book slowly to find pages full of Bucky's handwriting. Most of the pages were about the things that happened on his journey, small flashes of memories he had managed to recall, and various other things. She went through the pages one by one until she got to a one particular page with a photo glued on the paper: it was herself, smiling widely. It seemed to be cut off from another photo and Bucky brought it along with him when he left. Lily touched the photo ever so slightly, and then read the words Bucky had written under it.

"March 22nd, 2015.

When you have found the person who means so much to you, it's really hard to sleep alone without her in your grasp. I can't seem to forget her. Last night I dreamed about her again. I woke up half expecting her to be lying on the bed beside me, but of course I was alone. I hope she's doing well. I hope she's happy and safe. Nobody had ever cared for me as much as she does, and this love is scaring me."

Lily could feel the tears welling up and soon they trickled down her face uncontrollably. She covered her mouth as a soft sob escaped her lips. Her heart ached so much as she could imagine Bucky's face when he was writing this down.

"I think you should hold on to it until he recovers," Steve offered. He shifted closer to her and pulled her into a gentle hug, and she started sobbing into his chest. He could feel her whole body shaking and his strong arm tightened the hug instinctively. There was nobody else in this world who could relate to her feelings better than him. If only he had the courage to say out loud how broken his heart feels every time he thinks of Bucky, the person who matters so much to them both. If only he could tell her how miserable he feels every time he's in Wakanda, staring at his best friend through the clear glass of the cryo chamber—so close yet so far.

After a while, Lily could finally stop crying and Steve released the hug. She wiped her face with her sleeve and smiled shyly. "Thank you, Steve."

The blonde man returned the smile and nodded, staring at her with a gentle gaze.

"Don't worry," Sam suddenly spoke, putting his mug rather loudly on the table. "Bucky told me a bit about you, and believe me or not—I remember him saying he can't wait to get back to you."

Sam gave Lily two thumbs up so energetically that Lily couldn't help but laugh. The men seemed relieved to see her laugh.

"I understand how you feel, but all we can do is trust him. I've known Bucky since we were little, and I trust his decision. I'd support him no matter what," Steve said with a clear determination in his eyes.

"Yeah," Lily whispered. "It's compromise. It's not always rainbows and butterflies, but it's enough to keep us going. You know him best, Steve, so I trust you too."

She looked up and her eyes met Steve's bright blue eyes—she understands now how much they matter to each other. Having Steve here is a blessing, and they need each other as two people who care so much about Bucky.

"I'll keep waiting for him, no matter how long it takes," Lily continued, still staring into Steve's eyes; and the man smiled and nodded in agreement.