Prussia x reader - lost and forgotten

Chapter 11

I wake up the next day and rub my eyes, they sting. It was probably for crying last night. I let out a sigh and go take a shower, extra hot. I forgot about my cuts. The hot water hit them, it stings so bad. I turn the water temperature down, hitting my head against the wall. The water hit my back, relaxing me. I feel so miserable, useless. I keep my eyes close and take a deep breath. I wash up in the cold water and then get out. My stomach grumbles. I didn't eat anything yesterday. I get dressed in clean sweats and head to the living room. I open the fridge and see nothing. I hadn't shopped in a long time.

I groan and get in my car. I got shopping at my favorite store that's just around the corner. I grab some fruit and some of my favorite junk food and a pack of water bottles. Right when I was about to turn in to the aisle I see someone I don't want to see. Gilbert. " Shit.. " I mutter. I turn around and how he didn't see me. I try to act like I wasn't there to hope he wouldn't come over and see me. Then I hear my name. I turn around and look at him. I sigh and shake my head a little. " what do you want Gil? " I ask him, turning to the food, acting like in looking for something. I look up and ignore whatever he's saying. Ahh.. Soda. that's what I'm looking for. I try reaching up and getting it but being short sucks. " God dammit! " I shout. Gilbert reaches up and gets the soda I wanted. " thanks.. " I whisper. I want to cry. this reminds me when we went shopping he would always help me with things like that. I missed him so so so much.

After all I ended up hanging with him in my car because he didn't have a ride home he walked and I felt bad. He got all my groceries, which I appreciated, and packed it all up in the back of my car. I look over at him with a sad look. "Gilbert I miss you.. " I say truthfully. " but I don't know what to do.. " I almost seem to whisper. I let my head fall on my hands which were on the steering wheel. " Whatever you want I will respect. " he soothingly says, putting a hand on my back and gently rubbing it. I have been thinking so hard about taking him back. But at the same time he did something bad. I'm usually the one to forgive people. I really really want to it's so hard.. I remove my head from the wheel and look at him. I reach over and hug him tighty. I start to cry, feeling warm tears run down my face. I close my eyes and sniff. It felt so nice to be in his arms again. I missed his touch and his sweet words.

The toughest decision in my life was taking him in. I was so open-minded and full of love for the world who knew someone on the streets ended up to be my love? I would have never thought of it. I just cared to much to even really understand what love it.. to see the bad parts in a relationship, instead I was optimistic and thought nothing could have went wrong. that's something I could learn from. My heart pounded every single time I saw him. everyday.

I pull away and he wipes my tears. I look in his eyes and breath slowly. I look at his lips and then back at his eyes. I lean in and kiss him quickly. " You should probably get back to wherever you go. " I saying starting the car. He doesn't fight but just nods. I forgot to ask him where he stays and accidentally go to my house. " Shit I'm sorry. " I say, feeling like a complete idiot. " you know what? why don't you just stay for awhile. I'm as tired as hell. I'll drive you home later. okay? " he nods and I get out. he helps me with the groceries.

We sit on the couch and watch tv in silence. i didn't realize I fall asleep until I wake up later that night. I look over and see Gilbert sleeping with his arm around me. I lift my head off his chest for a second and reach for the remote. I turn off the tv and return to sleeping. I would have freaked out but I missed this- just me and him.

I woke up the next morning with him not beside me- what else am I supposed to expect. I'm to tired to get mad. I get up and look around until I hear someone- probably Gilbert open the door. I look behind me and see him with groceries. " Oh morning ( y/n ) " says Gilbert. " Good morning " I say quietly. It felt wierd. . . It felt like we were together again. He put stuff away and I leaned against the counter in the kitchen. " what are you doing? " I ask him. even though we aren't together and he's being nice I still have to be a little rude. " I was going to make breakfast " he said, starting to put pans on.

So for the rest of the day we had spent together but then I decided he couldn't stay any longer. I felt as if he was going to overcome his stay. I drove him home and checked my phone as I pull into my drive way. I stayed in my car and looked to see who texted me. it was sam. he wanted me to come over but I denied. I didn't feel like being anywhere but home, I was tired and was an emotional mess. I let my head fall on the couch and close my eyes. I wanted Gilbert, but I wanted sam. I have so much to think of.

The next day I sat on my bed and thought about it. I thought about Sam, about Gilbert. I didn't have to go to work for about an hour. I looked down at my hands, I sighed. I was so stressed about all of this. I just wanted to cry and cry on my mothers shoulder, but she wasn't here anymore. I even wished I had someone to talk to. but life's life. What do you expect?

Crashing waves, wind blowing in your hair. I was at the beach. It was my favorite place to be to calm down and think through everything. I lay down and set my arms behind my head, closing my eyes. It's so calming. I take a deep breath and listen to the waves. All the stress has suddenly lifted off my shoulders. I wonder what life is down under the sea. Wouldn't it be nice to just swim in the water. . Have no worries? not work? find the love of your life and have kids? It would be so nice.

I turn to my side and look at the sand. My hands run through it, it feels so nice. I think about how messed up and wrong my life was. And realized how I have made the best out of it. Everyone says how they wished they didn't have parents. I wished I had them. why did It have to happen to me? what did I ever do wrong? I loved my parents and then suddenly they died. And now I have no one, not even an animal. It was just me on my own to make my own mistakes and decisions without any guidance. It was no fair.

After all the thinking about wether I should be with Gilbert I decided to. He was a nice guy and he made a mistake. I didn't know if it was right but I was going to give it another try.

( sorry for the short chapter. I'm busy and don't have that much time to write! next chapter will be longer I promise! comment or vote for next chapter voting goal is at least 20 or around there! )