ring pops and cigs

06

i propped my feet up against the desk in front of me. a baggy t shirt hung loosely from my collarbones, drowning my whole figure in black. i liked it. it's like camouflage.

my hands started to shake, and my left eye started to twitch. i knew i needed a cig, but i propped my head back and let the chair dig into my neck. it was uncomfortable, but i liked testing my limits. after a few minutes of voluntary inflicted withdrawal, a lungkiller sat mercifully between my teeth, granting me the bliss i'd only been deprived from for a few days.

the smoke wasn't large enough to set off the smoke alarm, but the smell was pungent enough to alert some peers of my "wrongdoings." was it so wrong? we all have our addictions, and mine was only killing me. unlike love, which shatters both hearts if you're lucky. unlike clicking that damn pen constantly, because that kills thought processes as it influenced another, and could perhaps get the clicker killed and the rightful killer sued at least 75,003 dollars.

i inhaled, and waited. my lungs were started to constrict heavily, but i kept the smoke contained.

"i'm pretty sure the manual says you should breathe out."

the owner of the hoarse voice belonged to none other than him.

my voice always failed me when he's around, so i simply breathe the puffs of smoke into his unsuspecting lungs.

you take my breath away, so i might as well steal yours. ( call it, a retribution. )

kaleb coughed, before rolling his eyes. he was about to say something cocky, but his eyes clamped on the door. he took the cig out of my mouth, took a drag, and crushed it on the floor. i scowled, even though i knew the teacher was about to walk in and he probably saved my ass from another detention. i scowled because he has no right to protect me. (especially when he's the one who hurts me.)

during lunch, my friends hunched around the table. most of them didn't have lunch this period, but most of them didn't care. fatima wasn't one of them, being in all of my classes the first time since eighth grade. her arabian genes gave her good looks and sweet smiles-something i could only dream of. (the sweet smiles part, i'm kinda hot.)

she had soft features; almond eyes framed by thick, dark eyelashes, curling upwards and extending almost an inch out, thick eyebrows perfectly styled into an arch, a strong cupid's bow, moderately full lips, a strong nose, the slope upturning by the slightest at the end to hint at a button nose. all of that complimented by chubby, pink cheeks paired with strong cheekbones.

a small nudge to my ribs, and i realized she had caught me staring. her eyebrows raised in a moderate concern, and she didn't need to speak for me to know she was acknowledging my quietness. i shrugged, before winking at her, the small tilt of my lips consoling her. grinning proudly, she turned back to the conversation.

tuning back into the dialogue, i realized they were talking about skipping after they got food. i rolled my eyes. i wasn't in the mood to skip; at the most i'd go out to eat with them-giving i ditched them yesterday. my eyes instinctively glanced upwards to kaleb at my mind's reminder of yesterday's events. my thumb traced the scab that lies on the side of my wrist and curls around to the middle. he was skipping.

i exhaled quietly out of nose.

they wanted to skip and i couldn't help but follow ( because he was going, too. )