Why Her?

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This story contains mentions of death 

"Wh...what do you mean, she's gone?" You couldn't believe the words you were hearing, Caroline's words not registering in your head as you sat on the sofa with your phone pressed to your ear.

"She-she went out with Jeremy and some drunk driver hit the car." The older woman seemed eerily calm over the phone, something you didn't like. Not one bit. "The paramedics, they couldn't save her."

You couldn't form words, still completely numb from what you were hearing. There was no way that it could be true, you'd only seen her the day before. You were hearing things. Surely that's what it was. There was no way that she was gone. You could hear your heartbeat in your ears, the thudding sending you into a state of stillness.

"Y/N? I'm sorry, sweetie."

"No, I'm sorry. I...I need to go but I'll call you tomorrow or something if that's okay?" Your heart rate picked up as you said your goodbyes to the woman whom you had called mum for over 10 years of your life. Even with your perfectly amazing relationship with your parents, Caroline had treated you like her own since the beginning, welcoming you into the home with open arms and a warm smile. You were grateful to her, truly.

"That's fine, please don't become a stranger."

"Never."

You kept the phone to your ear until you could no longer hear Caroline's short breaths in your ear, staring at the spot on the carpeted floor where your best friend had once dropped red wine and stained it, the memory imprinted and causing the slightest hint of a smile to take over your lips.

"Shit! Harry's gonna kill me isn't he?" You looked to your best friend with a soft chuckle.

"No, he won't. He's spilt so much wine on this carpet that it's becoming a tradition." Your best friend stopped her frenzied patting of the stain to look up at you, her eyebrow quirked and her lips having been pulled into her mouth. "When we first moved in, he spilt a tiny drop right in front of the sofa that we managed to get rid of; and there's one spill near the kitchen door where he tripped up and it went flying. So now you've just added to the collection. Harry'll laugh, I promise."

Katherine took a deep breath before standing up, picking her glass back up from the coffee table to take another sip at, and sitting back on the sofa, letting herself get comfy once more.

The phone dropped from your hand, hitting your thigh before falling onto the floor by the sofa, right next to the wine stain Harry had put there. Your chest rose with each breath you were inhaling, the air not quite reaching your lungs before you were taking in more air. There was no warning for the tears that were about to fall for they all came at once, hurting you more with each passing second. She was really gone. She wasn't coming back.

Harry wasn't home yet, but you needed him with you. You needed his arms wrapped around your body holding you, telling you that it's all just a nightmare and you'll wake up tomorrow and she'll still be there. The only source of comfort you had around you was the throw blanket that Katherine had used the day before when she was at your house. It wasn't strong, but there was the slightest hint of her perfume left on the soft, Italian material of the blanket, something that you never wanted to disappear. The warm scent of coffee and vanilla, mixed with the soft notes of white rose of Black Opiumfilled your nose and left you sobbing even more. You had bought her the perfume for her birthday a couple of months before, knowing as soon as you smelt it that she would adore it.

Your breaths were short, chest aching from the constant movement of it. You'd never felt pain like it, your heart felt like it had been ripped in two, one half having been ripped out and trampled to the ground. It wasn't just mental pain you were feeling, your entire body hurt from crying, so much so that when you had to run to the toilet to be sick you struggled to move.

Once you'd emptied your stomach into the ceramic bowl of the toilet, you sat back on the cold marble floor to catch your breath. The tears were running down your face at lightning speed, your breaths so shallow you kept gasping for air and you weren't quite sure whether you would stop crying or not. Half of your being had been ripped from you, leaving you without a best friend, without the person who you could trust with anything, without your sister.

"Why her, God? Why...why did you have to take her...take her from me?! She didn't do anything bad and you had to take her from me. You took my best friend." You couldn't control your breathing, working yourself up to the point of hyperventilating. "Why couldn't you have taken me instead? She had so much to live for. She was going to her graduation, she was going to get married and have babies, she was going to have her own house that she worked for and she was going to be the best damn lawyer in the business. Why did you have to take her and not me?!" Your hands were trembling as you spoke, the tears leaving you leaving salty trails down your normally soft cheeks.

Your head flew back into the toilet bowl as you threw up more contents of your stomach, though you had been sure that there was nothing left for you to bring up. The sound of the front door closing hadn't even registered in your head, the thumping of your heartbeat still loud in your ears and blocking all other noises from around you.

"Y/N? I'm home, where are you?" Harry walked upstairs to hear muffled noises from the bathroom at the top of them. "Y/N, baby? Everything okay?"

That's when he heard your sobs, the door softening them but not enough for him to realise how bad they were. His anxiety hit immediately, needing to get to his fiance who was clearly distraught over something. As soon as he pushed the bathroom door open, seeing his whole world curled into a ball next to the toilet, his heart broke. He had never moved as fast as he did at that moment, sliding down next to you and wrapping his arms around your body to pull you into him.

You sat on his lap, your head pressed into his chest and your arms holding yourself as you continued to let sob after sob leave you. Even though he knew he wouldn't get a straight answer, he had to try to find out what was bothering you.

"Baby, I need you to tell me what's gotten you in such a state."

"She...she's gone, H." Your diaphragm had a spasm, leaving you hiccuping in Harry's arms, his body moving with yours. "They fucking killed her."

Harry was confused. Beyond confused, really. You were completely fine when he'd left for work that morning, so to come home to you hyperventilating on the bathroom floor after having clearly been sick wasn't what he was expecting.

"Who's gone? Tell me who's gone, angel."

"Katherine! THEY TOOK MY BEST FRIEND FROM ME!" Your body grew limp against Harry, your eyes squeezed shut and your hands bunching the material of his top at his chest to clench. "They took my best friend."

"Wha'? How?" Of course, he was confused. You were too.

"Some stupid, fucking drunk driver killed her! SHE'S GONE, HARRY! I don't think I can cope with this. What am I meant to do without her? She was my best friend."

Harry rocked you in his arms, needing you to calm down so that you weren't harming yourself. He knew how much you loved Katherine, anyone who saw both of you together would know how much you loved one another.

"Shh, baby. We'll get through this, together."

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