I think I'm actually going to kill him.
It shouldn't be allowed. It actually shouldn't. If I were the mage I would make it against wizard law to be Simon Snow.
I just fought him and won, some chosen one. Managed to push him down the stairs, it felt good. Now he's off complaining to the mage.
'Oh boohoo, I'm Simon, I'm the prettiest little wizard, I hate Baz, Blah blah blah.'
He's fucking adorable and it's killing me.
I have to kill him. I actually do have to. If I don't save anyone else at least I won't have to see his sickening beauty anymore.
It's just not fair that he should be able to inflict so much pain on me and not feel a thing. It's as if there's a glass wall between us, and he's cursing me to eternal pain and I can't reach him. I can't do anything back.
He shouldn't be allowed to be in my thoughts 24/7 and I can't even cross his mind twice a day. I can fix that. At least if he hates me that's an emotion. It also destroys every shred of hope. If I don't have hope, I can't get hurt.
Shit, the door opened, it's him.
"Baz, what the fuck!"
Oh, it's that Bunce girl.
"Hello Bunce, fancy seeing you here." Simon thinks I don't know that she comes here all the time, but I'm not stupid. I've almost figured out how she does it.
"Why did you push Simon down the stairs??" She accuses. "He could have been killed! You could've been expelled!"
"He's not dead? That's a shame." I honestly don't care what she thinks of me. Except she's not scared of me, which is quite annoying, really.
"Oh my- I cannot believe you!" She turns and storms back out, slamming the door behind her.
I roll my eyes and sigh. She could be a useful ally if she weren't Simon's friend. But she is, and if I hate Simon I have to do it right, which means hating everything and everyone he loves.
Crowley, imagine if I was his friend. That would be fucking horrendous. He would never be mean to me, how could I hate him? Ha, hats off to anyone who can deal with that. And anyone who can't- Wow. I don't blame you.
The door opens again, it is actually Simon this time. I shuffle into a more nonchalant position and adjust my hair slightly.
He walks in at a moderate pace, not acknowledging my presence. He picks up a book and sits down on his bed, wincing slightly. I must have bruised his tailbone. Crowley Simon! Couldn't you have gotten the mage to fix that?
And he just sits on his bed reading.
Yell at me! Physically hurt me, anything! Please Simon, fucking say something! Tell me how much you hate me and I'm a scheming brat, a vampire, something!
I can't hate him. As soon as he walked in I felt bad. He's still just sitting there. He must be in shock. He's been reading the same paragraph for the last five minutes.
"Why did you do it?" He asks finally.
"What?"
"Push me down the-" He pauses. "The fucking stairs."
There it is.
"Oh, OH, so it's my fault now? I had no idea, I seem to recall some idiot crashing into me. What I did was purely self-defence!" It's true. Sort of... His shoulder brushed mine and I freaked out.
"YOU TRIED TO BITE ME, BAZ! YOU WERE GOING TO RIP MY FACE OFF!"
Like I said, I kind of lost it...
"SELF-DEFENCE, Snow!"
"Ok, so I was supposed to know that accidentally brushing shoulders with you would make you flip out?"
"You threw the first actual punch, so yeah! It's your fault!"
"Y'know what? Why do I even care? I'm so tired of trying to care what you think. I don't even care anymore. I don't care about you. Do what you like, just stay the hell away from me."
Shit, no, you were supposed to hate me.
"Whatever, Snow. You know you hate me."
He inhales deeply, trying to calm himself. I can see his jaw tensing, trying to release some pent up anger.
I smile inwardly. He's so adorable when he's mad.
Yep, he hates me.
