Kid?

Chapter 5: We're All Here

Peter blinked the sleep out of his eyes and looked out the window from where he lay in his bed. The sky was dull and the rain hammered down on the window. Glancing at his alarm it read '09:12, Saturday'. He had spent the night before scratching at his legs, it seemed to much effort to even hurt himself properly at that point. He was too exhausted from another day of pretending. Now, his legs were a wreck as old scabs had been pried off. He drew his knees into his chest and squeezed his eyes shut again. Peter really did not want to be awake.

"Hey Bruce, you got the time?"
"About half 6" was the reply Tony got.
The team had just sat round the rectangular table and was waiting for Nat and Steve to finish up cooking the dinner, the team minus Peter. Tony looked up the corridor to see if he was on his way now, Peter would've gotten the same alert from FRIDAY about dinner that the rest of the avengers had. Tony waited a few minutes but he saw no sign at all of Peter. Come to think of it, Tony hadn't seen the kid all day. So where was he.
"Uh guys," Tony said, "Have any of you guys seen Peter today?."
Everyone's gaze shifted to Tony and Thor spoke up
"I for one have not seen the man of spiders at all today."
Around the table people were nodding in agreement with Thor. Tony placed his hand to his forehead.
"Is there a chance he's been out and about and we've just missed him?"
"Well Thor and I have been doing a Brooklyn 99 marathon in the living room since this morning. I've got to say I've not seen him go into the kitchen at all." This time it was Clint that spoke.
Panic was building in his chest. Not at all? But the kid has to eat.
"Want me to go check on him?" Natasha turned from where she was standing to face the table. She had slightly scrunched up her face, clearly thinking about Peter. He had really grown on her, she had got to know him a bit before the snap but since he'd came back she'd been spending more time around the tower and around him. He was a sweet kid and she had become very fond of him.
"No. I'll go." Tony got to his feet and swiftly walked the pathway to Peter's room.

Peter heard a knock at his door. He'd hoped that he would be left alone after ignoring FRIDAY's alert but of course he had no such luck. He never did.
"Peter, are you in there?"
Peter simply turned over in his bed to face the window, his back to the door.
"Peter come on, FRIDAY already told me you are. So either you let me in or I'll let myself in," Tony's voice had a pressing tone to it. He was worried what he would find when he went in. Peter wasn't replying so what if something was wrong. Maybe he'd walk in and find Peter slumped on the floor having succumbed to some injury. He should've followed up more thoroughly about Peter's injury on his leg, he knew Peter was hiding something and he should've went about finding what it was with more urgency. Tony was going to find his son dead and it was going to be all his own fault. Of course, FRIDAY should've told him if Peter was in danger, but what if he hadn't been clear enough with his instructions for the AI to alert him. Tony scolded himself for waisting time, Peter hadn't replied and Tony should have already opened the door.

Peter heard the door swing open and shuffled further under the covers but he made no move to turn over and look at the man who had entered.

Thank god. Tony could see the outline of Peter shifting in his bed. Now he knew Peter was alright, he was kind of pissed.
"Peter what the hell are you doing? It's time to get up, dinner is going on the table and it's non negotiable,"
From under the duvet there was a slightly muffled reply, "I'm not hungry."
Tony was stunned, this kid, this kid, was going to be the death of him. Tony knew fine well how fast his metabolism was and he knew that he must be hungry. To top that off he sounded tired. Tony had to figure out what was going on with Peter. The panic Tony felt only fuelled the anger that was going into his voice.
"Peter, where have you been all day?"
"Here," another pathetic sounding reply came from beneath the duvet.
"If that's true then you must be hungry, so get up," Tony's voice had a sharp edge. He couldn't help feeling pissed along with his fear.
"I'm not, just go away would you. Please." Peter's voice sounded hollow.
Tony didn't know what to do but he felt like he was fighting a loosing battle. He had begun to wonder if maybe Peter's problems weren't so easy to put into words. Bullies Tony could- and had in the past- help Peter deal with, but this was different and Tony thought a little more complex. So he left, but not before saying another few words.
"Peter I care so much about you, I just need you to tell me what I've got to do here."
"Just go away Mr Stark."
That stung. Mr Stark. Peter hadn't called him that in so long. Tony had thought the days of Peter dancing around him with what he said were over.

Peter could hear Tony's sigh as he walked away from Peter's room, swinging the door shut behind him. What was wrong with him? Tony had done everything for him, and Peter repayed him like that. He'd been doing his best not to be a burden and yet he still acted that horribly, to Tony no less. Peter felt tears form in his eyes. What the fuck was wrong with him?

The whole team looked at Tony as he entered back into the kitchen. Natasha and Cap had sat down at the table while Tony had been away.
"Where's Peter?" Steve questioned.
"He says he's not hungry."
The team looked as skeptical as Tony felt. They were all just as aware as Tony about how much Peter needed to eat.
"I don't know what to do." Tony sounded defeated, and everyone could hear it, "I don't know how to help him if he won't tell me what he needs help with."
Most of the avengers were surprised by the emotion Tony seemed to be displaying. Most of them meaning all but Steve.
The captain looked at Tony and wanted so bad to be able to help him. Tony had been a good job lately of acting all perfect in front of everyone but he couldn't hide from Steve. Steve knew that Tony had been spending nights awake stressing and had been forgetting to eat until Steve would leave a plate of something beside him. It wasn't that uncommon for Tony but this week had been hard on him.
"He's a strong kid, Tony. He's been through a lot and he knows how to handle himself. He also knows that we're all here if he can't handle it himself."
"I'm not so sure Cap."
Cap's heart was breaking. Tony wanted so bad to agree with Steve but he could see how hard whatever was affecting Peter was hitting him. Tony had been low before and he did not want that for Peter. He also knew that when had been low, it would've taken a lot for him to ever actually tell anyone. He had a sneaking suspicion it may be the same for Peter.
"Either way,"Bruce said, "We're all here at the tower right now, we can all keep an extra eye on him. See what we think. Apart from that we should just go about as normal. It makes no sense to upset Peter by upsetting his surroundings."
The team murmured there agreements from around the table, all of them quite happy to keep an extra eye out for Peter's sake.
So despite all Tony's concerns he sat with his friends and ate dinner, trying to rationalise all his thoughts about Peter. He at least took some solace in the fact that he trusted the people around him to look out for Peter until he himself could figure out what to do.

Peter sat up and rubbed his face into his hands. His head pounded and his face was sticky with drying tears. The painful weight on his chest threatened to suffocate him. He could not keep doing this.

Published: 23.06.2019