Steam

Chapter 12

He stomped out in to the mud, it was pelting down with rain outside but he didn't care. It flew down like bullets against his back each one thudding against his skin and sending a little burst of pain into him.

By this point, he was sobbing, though you couldn't tell if it was the rain or tears. It was fair to say it was both, however more so the latter. His chest heaved and he struggled to breathe as he cried and shouted out in the storm. His boots and lower legs were splattered with mud as he marched on down the path to the rose bushes. He wanted to be in the only place he could find peace.

His white shirt was soaked and clung to his well formed abdomen. Over the past few months, he had began to mature and take on a more manly physique. His glasses were beginning to steam and he couldn't see clearly, mainly for the tears that endlessly poured from his eyes. He was shaking; from fear, sadness, anger and confusion. He had never experienced all these feelings at once and he was overwhelmed by it all.

He was still walking at high speed, his fists clenched into tight balls as he sobbed. He turned to the rose bush right at the end of the garden and slumped against the wall behind it. The small patch had been kept dry from protection from the bush. There, he pulled his knees up under his chin, rested his arms across his knees and continued to sob painfully in to his arms.

His heart ached and stomach curled in pain as he cried; he was at loss. Around him, the thunder boomed and lightening shattered the ominous, slate-coloured clouds in yellow strikes. The world around him roared the anger he could only express in the whimpers of a fifteen-year-old boy.

He cried for Victoria. The woman he knew he could never have. He felt her pain at being unloved and he wanted nothing more than to take her in to his arms and tell her he was prepared to give her the world, that he would comfort her whenever she felt sad, would laugh with her, dance with her, caress her, grant her every wish to the best of his ability... But it pained him to say that he knew he couldn't. That his undying love for her would go unnoticed for most likely the rest of his life.

He pulled his head up and wiped his eyes with the top of his wrist, and took a deep breath. He rested his head back against the wall and looked up to the sky. The clouds were thick and heavy and showed no signs of stopping this violent rain shower. It was late October and he knew that in weeks to come, this heavy rain would turn to snow. He remembered the previous winter where he had first seen Victoria walking the gardens in her warm cost and gloves. His insides glowed warmly at the thought.

He traced his fingers over the delicate droplets that beaded his pale arms, and they trickled over the edge, dripping on to his trousers or the floor. His mind wandered and he sat just looking and admiring his surroundings.

He looked up suddenly. The storm had reduced to a soft patter of rain on the concrete. He realised he must've been sat there for ages. He had lost all track of time as he had been sat there. Only now did he realise how cold he was; it was arctic outside and he could no longer feel his fingers. He wiped his face with his soaking hands and dragged himself up, using the wall for support. He noticed how wet he was, and grimaced at the mud-caked boots on his feet. All cried out, he began back to the house. He didn't know how long he had been out there, but it was long enough by his standards.

When he got back to the kitchen, the three girls had left. Everything was spotless, and only a pile of neatly folded washing and a pile of glistening dishes remained. He removed his boots, being careful not to splatter mud everywhere. He tossed them on the floor to his left and left for his room. He was pleased to have relieved all his emotions that evening. He had, however, found it absolutely exhausting and planned to go straight to bed.

Laid in bed, he was drained of all energy and fell asleep almost immediately. He dreamt of rain, roses, dancing, crying, pain, but most of all, Victoria.