Her love & her regrets

chapter#9 (unedited)

Aslam o alaikum guys

One week later

Faraz pov:

I was tapping my foot on the red carpet in the drawing room, currently I was in dad's house in Islamabad, I came here yesterday and today after breakfast dad told me to wait in the drawing room so that he can discuss something with me.

I knew what he wanted to discuss but I didn't argue and silently obeyed him, as I had nothing to do other than waiting so I started to scanning the room which was same as it was before 10 years.

After mom's death I never came in this house and went to my maternal uncle in Karachi, he was single but as soon as dad handed over his half property in my hands I bought new house for me there. Dad used to come to me every month for few days and to say those days always ended up irritating for me and my dad both, would be true. Maybe because we never understood eachother and what he did to my mother, I would never forget that.

As I was dozed off, door clicked open making me sit straight on the lavish sofa.

Dad made his presence wearing a casual light green T-shirt and trousers, wet grey hair indicated that he had a shower. His strong perfume took whole room in it's effect.

He sat opposite me on a sofa and crossed his legs, he gave me a soft genuine smile before licking his lips. " Why is he nervous" the thought that crossed my mind.

"Faraz I know that you're angry with me for finalizing your marriage without your consent but this girl Hania really deserve someone who would support her through thick and thin, who would understand her no matter what because she has been through a lot and I know that you are the best thing that will happen to her"
Dad's words left me speechless for a minute, but then thought of selfishness crossed my mind that 'What about me'? 'Am I that much useless that no one thinks of me'? 'Will there be anyone for me who would love me and cure me or Am I the only one to heal every one?

"What are you thinking? " He asked, breaking the chain of questions which my heart was bombarding on my mind.

"She's the amazing girl, trust me, you are lucky that you're getting married to her " I chuckled sarcastically at this joke.

"Dad the way she talked to me was not an amazing thing at all, she's the headache" Dad glared at me, making my mouth shut but my emotions were taking there best.

"What about me? Have you ever thought about me? Or you think that I am living a super happy life where there are no worries, no tensions and problems? Just tell me one thing that did you understand my mother when she expected you to support her? Did you stood by my mother when she needed you the most? Just because of you I lived my 10 years without my mother. You can't understand the pain of a 15 years old child when his mother was declared dead, when he has to live his entire stupid life without his first love, his mother.... You just can't understand me because there are so many people around you whom you love and support.. "

I was unable speak more because at that moment I realised that I was standing up, shouting at my father, who was sitting there in shock and tears were glistening in his eyes.  I was too shocked at my outburst. I was unable to meet his gaze because I was regretting already, I quickly stormed out of the room and went outside of the house.

I was roaming around the streets like a lost child, don't know why but as soon as I took out all my anger, my mind and heart were at peace. I was now tired because I was walking since morning and now my legs were also hurting, so I went in nearby park and sat there on the bench.

Thank God I was having some money in my pocket so I bought 2 sandwiches in the evening. I looked at my wrist watch and my eyes went wide because it was 10:00 pm. My eyes were closing on their own so I didn't torture myself more and slept there on the bench.