Lost in Translation

Mama

Thank you Mama for the drive to be perfect that you have drilled into my skull, but the pressure that it has created is making my brain want to implode on itself

Thank you Mama for teaching me to follow my dreams even though it's not what you imagined for me

Thank you Mama for always being one phone call away, but I'm sorry that I'm not brave enough to reach out during the worst of it

Thank you Mama for accepting my creativity even though you don't understand where it comes from because trust me its saved my life before

Mama I'm trying to be everything you want me to be because I need to make you proud. Mama I'm trying to stay strong like you taught me but life is breaking me to the point of no return. Mama I'm trying to create the life I've dreamed but its not falling into place like you promised.

Mama I hope you're proud of me even though I got my first degree at 23 and not 18. Mama I hope you hype me up to your friends like I hype you up to mine. Mama I can't keep running in circles anymore because I'm becoming more drained everyday that I'm scared its going to catch up to me and I won't see in coming before it's too late.

Thank you Mama for giving me the space I need but sometimes I don't know what to do or say and I just need my Mama to push for answers

Thank you Mama for accepting that I love everyone regardless of gender and not being scared to say you don't know what some terms mean

Thank you Mama for teaching me that it's okay to go against the grain of the world because the difference in my thoughts is what is going to change the world for the better one day

Tomorrow is your birthday Mama and even though I'm far away from home now you're still going to be hearing my voice telling you how much

I love you.

because without you in my life

I would be nothing.