tired yet? ||cashby||

Chapter 16

"Are you sure you'll be okay?" My mom asked me for the thousandth time. "I can stay with you, if you want."

"Mom," I chuckled, "it's really okay. It's just for a few days."

"5 days!" she stressed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Listen, honey, we trust you, okay? Be careful." Guilt nipped at my heart, and I lowered my eyes for a moment.

"No problem. I'll probably just watch Netflix the whole time," I muttered.
My father and two siblings were outside in the car, with bags containing enough clothes for their college visits. Michael would be a junior in a month and a half, and my parents thought that it meant he was already thinking about which school he wanted to go to. Of course, I knew he couldn't care less, but the excited looks on their faces were too much to say no to. I was just elated that they weren't dragging me along on their little self discovering academic journey.

"We love you, sweetie. If you have any problems, I left you a list of numbers on the fridge for Poison Control, Emergency Responses, and all our neighbors in case you need to leave the house, or if you need help with anything," she rambled on, doting and fretting tenaciously. "Like I said, there's food in the freezer, and in the fridge. Make sure you feed yourself enough, and don't forget to shower, and-"

"Mom!" I cut her off, annoyed. "Do you really think I'm going to forget to bathe?" She stared at me, narrowing her eyes.

"Are you giving me lip? Because I can unpack my stuff now, and keep you busy with chores while your siblings get to take college tours," she threatened, even though I knew it was a bluff.

"Nope! No lip, nothing of the sort. I'll be fine. I'll call you every night. Thanks, mom, love you," I said in a rush, kissing her on the cheek.

"Don't get your gay all over the house while we're gone!" Michael called out the window of the car, and my mother's face turned pink.

"Mikey!" she squealed, strutting over to scold him.

"Michelle, get in the car," my dad sighed, and she huffily scooted into the passenger seat.

"Bye!" they all called at varying levels of enthusiasm, the most being my mother, and the least being my father who said nothing at all. They sped away down the street, and I breathed a sigh of relief. For a few hours today, I just needed some alone time. Some time to get away, and let my mind air out.

Walking back in the house, I looked around and listened: nothing. The silence wasn't a burden, though. It felt like a weight had lifted from my chest. This freeing feeling inside me made me feel invincible. Bringing my two hands together quickly, I clapped: nothing but echoes. Leisurely, I grabbed my bag and put my phone inside it, along with a jacket and a water bottle. Some fresh air would do me good, I supposed.

Stepping back outside, I set out down the road, looking at all the gorgeous trees and grass. Every route was the scenic route when it came to the area I lived in; leaves and grass danced before my eyes, shaking and swimming in the wind. It raked its fingers through my hair, blowing back my clothes in a warm summer breeze. It felt so alive, whispering its melody in every corner of my world.

Despite my alone time, I wished, just then, that Austin could be with me. My hand yearned to be enclosed in his. My lips felt desperate to be pressed up against his own two. It was a feeling that was almost suffocating, but not simply that. It was a mix of agony, but also joy, for I knew I would see him later in the day. The two emotions battled it out in my chest, leaving me a smiling, stupid mess.

The patter of my feet against the ground kept me company, and I hummed to myself. My favorite flower field was just ahead, looking serene and lovely. With happy deliberateness, I plopped myself down in a patch of covers under the sun. My mom used to say that clovers were edible, and that's why bees loved them so much. She said that they tasted sweet, like honey, and all the little bees gathered around to pollinate them in the spring and summer. I knew, now, that they weren't as sweet as honey, but the bees still gathered anyhow. The mere thought of my childhood made me smile.