Talking to Bts wasn't as easy as Yoongi imagined, it wasn't that Bts were making it difficult to talk to them, if anything they were encouraging him, the problem was him.
Everytime he got close to talking with them he'd chicken out. Something was stopping him and he didn't know what.
The first time he'd approched their dorm door, seeing as it was only next door, and he was about to knock. But something inside him told him not to so he ran, back into his apartment.
That wasn't good, in his eyes he was just being a pussy and weak, three cuts were added to his thighs that day.
The second time he was passing Namjoon in a corridor, he had planned on stopping the younger and saying he wanted to meet up. But once again he paniced, quickly rushing past Namjoon again, who he heard sigh.
This made him believe even more he was a pussy and couldn't do anything right. Three more cuts were added to the collection.
The third time was the day of Bts' concert, Big hit had got him vip tickets, so he planned on catching them backstage, but again chicken out.
Everytime he chicken out, more and more cuts, more and more blood being lost, it wasn't good, he felt like he was collapsing, he couldn't do anything right, his work was slipping, he couldn't focus, he didn't have the energy to get out of bed, he felt like a complete and utter dissapointment.
He keeps thinking, what is, what if he never ran away, what if he went back, what if he told them what was happening, what if his father had just killed him, what if he died on the streets, what if he killed himself, the what if's seemed endless.
But it isn't the what if's he needs to focus on, he needs to face on the reality, what happened, not what could of happened, he needed to focus on what needed to happen. What he needed to do.
So he built up his courage, preparing himself as he stood in the corridor, walking out the elevator and starting towards Bts' dorm.
As he was walking Bts came out, happy and laughing until the saw Yoongi.
Yoongi gulped, he courage wavering.
As they stalked passed, Namjoon behind them all, he spoke.
"Erm Namjoo-" The boy walked straight passed, ignoring Yoongi completely, well not completely as he did glare at him
Yoongi sighed, watching the six walk away, Yoongi entering his own dorm.
The familar itch appearing on his arms like needles.
He didn't care anymore, he just didn't care, he went to his bathroom, breath shaky and uneven.
He rolled his sleeves back with trembling hands.
Struggling to grasp the shiny blade in his shaking hands, he pushed it to his left forearm, the cuts from months ago fading until they were barely visable.
He took a sharp breath as he slid it across his arm diagonal, the voice in his head egging him to go deeper, and deeper he went.
He dropped to the floor as he watched the blood pour from his arms, he almost smiled like a physco at the sight.
He pushed the blade into his right forearm, blood off his right arm dripping down the blade, he sliced it across his arm, also diaganol.
The blade hit the floor with a deafening crash, Yoongi slumping to the floor.
His vision was going blurry, he was on the verge on unconsiousness. Just then the front door opened.
Yoongi could just make out the blurred voices, he couldn't distinguish them, his mind being to far away.
The bathroom door was thrown open. The 7 people stood in shock at the sight of Yoongi laying on the floor, on the verge of unconsiousness and bleeding continuously from his arms.
BamBam was the first to unfreeze, leaping forward towards Yoongi, pulling him into his arms, beggin him to stay awake, Jinyoung was holding towels yo his arms, Jackson was frantically sobbing into the phone to tell the paramedics to hurry up.
Yugyeom was led out of the bathroom but Jb, as his breathing went ragged when his saw Yoongi, Jb helping him through a panic attack.
Yoongi could hear many words but they were all being blurred, his couldn't distinguish a voice or a face, but he knew he was in BamBam's arms.
Yoongi could feel himself slipping further and further away, he could see the blinding white light appear at the end of the tunnel.
"I'm sorry" he wispered as he finally closed his eyes. BamBam screamed, holding Yoongi closer to his chest, everyone else was sobbing, the younger ones being held by the olders as they waited for the paramedics.
The paramedics eventually arrived, quickly placing Yoongi on a strecher and rushing him to the hospital, Got7 following closely.
They swore, no matter what, Yoongi would wake up, and when he did, they'd helped him, every step of the way.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Just so you know,
Yoongi and BamBam will not ened up together
Tbh i dont really like the ship at all
Dunno really why i picked BamBam but i did so eh
They WILL NOT end up together just so you know
~Catherine
