How To Live

Chapter Ten

Wesley and I stay out at the Meadow until the sun begins to dip below the skyline and the summer air turns chilly. Today has been one of the rare times since Tommy died that I have actually thoroughly enjoyed myself. I have let go of all the thoughts and feelings of my brother and my parents for a moment and let myself embrace the peace and serenity that the Meadow has to offer, and it has been exactly what I needed. Some long awaited time to clear my head and breathe, to not feel like I'm constantly suffocating in other people's issues and problems. To focus on what makes me feel good for once in my life.

Spending time with Wesley Martin makes me feel exactly that. It makes me feel happy and light and less like the girl I used to constantly pretend to be. For the first time in my life I feel like Wesley is the only person that has seen a glimpse of the real me, and that is kind of scary.

Today I let loose and I went to the Meadow, knowing my Father would be fuming if he ever found out. I spent time with a boy from across the tracks and I got to now him better than I ever thought I would, and I have loved every minute of it. For the first time in my life I feel like today was real, like I was actually being myself for once, and it has been incredible.

Wesley's friends begin to leave as the sun starts to disappear and we decide that it's time we too head back into town. We climb out of the water and pull on our clothes, shivering in the afternoon breeze.

"Your friends are all really nice." I say him as we head back up the dirt track and out towards his truck.

"Yeah, they're pretty cool. I think they really liked you too." He replies with a smile.

I can't help but smile too, glad that his friends approve of me and now know that I'm not just the snobby Mayor's daughter that they all thought I was.

"Wes, why did you want me to tutor you?" I ask him as we climb into his truck. "There are plenty of great tutors at Bolton High, and you know my Father is not your biggest fan, so why me?"

"Because of Tommy." Wesley replies as he blasts the heaters. "I got to know your brother, he became a really great friend to me and I realised that he wasn't the guy I thought he was. I always judged him, and you, because of who your Father is. I thought you were just a couple of rich kids who had everything handed to you and all you cared about was your image. But I was wrong about Tommy, and I wanted to see if I was wrong about you too."

"Were you wrong?" I ask as we head back into town. "Were you wrong about me?"

"Absolutely." He says with a grin. "I thought you were this shy snobby princess. But you're actually very loud and you talk a lot more than I expected." He laughs and I jab him in the side.

"Ha-ha very funny. What did you think of Tommy?" I ask seriously.

"I thought he was a really nice guy, a talented football player, popular but modest. Wicked sense of humour and he always had my back. I could trust him." Wesley says turning back into town. "He was more than a decent guy Ash, one you should be proud to be related to."

"Thanks." I say, his words touching and sweet.

I am proud of my brother. I am proud of his achievements and his reputation, but I also can't help but feel slightly disappointed in him. Because I feel like I never got to meet the guy that Wesley is talking about. The one who hung out on the other side of the tracks, openly disregarding our Father's rules and doing what he thought was right. I wish I had the chance to meet that version of Tommy Stanton.

"Can you drop me at the Mayor's office?" I ask Wesley.

It is time I talk to my Father. I've been avoiding him since Tommy died, but I'm tired of pretending. I am tired of maintaining the façade that we are the perfect happy little family because it's a lie, and I don't want to be a liar anymore.